Every life is a series of choices and chances, paths taken and not taken. We can ponder the unknowables of who we would be, if. If we'd grown up in a different place, or a different time; if we'd chosen a different school or a different career; if we'd looked different, or even been a different sex. This last "if" has a special quality -- from the point of view of this blog, at least. Because for most of us, our opposite-sex alternate reality has a name.
Even in this age of ultrasound, most parents still consider both boys' and girls' names for each baby-to-be. In some families, the unused name is later given life in the form of a younger brother or sister. In many cases, though, the name simply lingers in parents' minds as personal connection, insubstantial yet meaningful. My husband and I had just-in-case boys' names picked out when our daughters were born, and I still feel a sentimental attachment to those names. On some level, they're still "mine"...and in that way, they belong to my daughters, too. But of course my daughters don't remember those names, and can only hear them as foreign to themselves.
In fact, my own alternate-sex, alternate-reality name feels just as foreign to me. I was taken aback when my mother informed me that if I had been a boy, I would have been named Evan. Now Evan is a fine name indeed. It even ranked as one of the most "likeable" of all names in my informal poll a couple of years back. But it doesn't feel like me.
It's a mind-bender of a question, "what name would suit you if you were the opposite sex?" That's a lot of layers of hypothetical to fight through. Yet it's clear to me that Evan's light, contemporary Celtic style doesn't fit my image of myself.
I can't help but wonder how much that is shaped by the name I have borne all of these years. Laura and Evan are very different in history and style. If I had lived my life as, say, "Megan," would Evan seem like a more natural masculine alter ego? And if so, does that mean that as a Megan, I would have a different sense of self?
Try the exercise yourself: think about what you would name your own opposite-sex identity today. Not necessarily the name you like best, but the name that feels most natural to you. How does it relate to the name you actually bear -- and, if you know it, to the name you would have borne in your parents' alternate reality?
Your Alternate-reality Identity
10/15/2008, 12:47PM
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Comments
KRC -- I understand what you mean about relishing the newness aspect, but I think once you have your baby in hand (whether it's Astrid or Hugo or ...), that will cease to be as important. A baby immediately changes your perspective on just about everything. By all means mourn the loss of the new now, but I think it won't trouble you once the baby is here.
I really doubt Astrid will become the new Emma. It just doesn't have enough of the currently popular elements for girls' names. The only one it really has is the initial letter (there are scads of girls whose names begin with A). While there may be a certain subset of parents who will use it with greater frequency, I still think it will be confined.
BTW, Astrid Leslie is quite nice and a wonderful tribute to your aunt.
KRC- The highest Astrid has ever been in popularity is 728 in 1907, most recent rank was 934 in 2005. So even if it goes back in the top 1000 and goes up "alot" it would probably still be in the 700s at most. I think we talked about names being in the top 50 for you to be likely to meet more than a few people with your name. So there is no way a character who probably won't show up much on a show some people watch will turn Astrid into Emma. If you love it I vote use it! Another option though is Ingrid, I often group them together so just a thought...
I also think Astrid Leslie is lovely!
When I named my son Thomas Evan, my mother told me I would have been Thomas Ernst if I had been a boy. I don't know how well I would have done being named after my father. I have often wondered how much my name has influenced me because my mother always told me that I was named after Melanie in Gone with the Wind because she was so good. Growing up I was the meek and mild goody girl in many ways and now that I am an adult I find myself rethinking my namesake as a role model. I do find that I connect to the name Evan (besides giving it to my son) and am not quick to come up with names on my own so I guess I'd pick this as my alternative name.
You all are making me feel much better. I am trying to calm down. I just can't believe it. What are the damn odds? But you are right, Amy3, the baby itself will put things in perspective for me. My husband reminded me several times last night that despite my claiming that this was my worst nightmare, it was NOT, on any level, my worst nighmare.
I was remembering when Rachel and Ross named their baby Emma on Friends. But at that time, Emma was already very popular and R&R were expected to pick what would be a generally accepted "good" name. Jan on The Office is strange and abnormal - the name she was considering for a boy was Chevy. So I am hoping they were trying to pick a name that was "out there" and I am also hoping that baby will go away on the show. Jan's baby can't be that involved in this particular show, right?
Like you, Amy3, I feel completely the opposite when people on this blog like the name Astrid or have their own little Astrids - that I feel good about. But a celebrity or a TV show - UGH!!!!
Thanks for the support.
I also wanted to add - I called my one friend who knows what my baby names are to tell her about Jan naming her baby Astrid, and after her immediate shock, she said, "Well, what did your blog say?" She thinks I am somewhat crazy for reading this blog all the time, but I love that she knew exactly where I had already turned.
I think "Astird" is still safe, though... ;)
KRC: I think that you should not worry about The Office. I really like Astrid but will most likely never have one. So use it and enjoy it!
I was born in 1979. Want to guess my name?? Jessica. And my boy-name? Ryan. I would not necessarily pick that for me as I know myself now bc my second brother is Ryan. Yet, we are so much alike and I know and understand him enough that I could see it. I would never choose for myself the name(s) I use for my kids. I have a George who would have been Catherine (after both our grandmas). I have no idea what my dh girl name would have been. Probably a bit more bible-ish than his very time appropriate Michael.
With lots of younger siblings I have an intersting perspective on my parents naming style.
Joel/would have been Judith
Ryan/Veronica (and Victoria if the twins they thought)
William/ ??? Maybe Melissa
Lynnelle/Grant
Melissa/Grant
I just don't get where she got Judith. odd to me.
I am another who pronounces Amelia with 4 syllables... except when I'm speaking quickly, in which case the last two merge. I have to agree with Valerie, Karyn and RobynT have said about British pronunciations and some American accents being closer to British ones. I think it's a little silly to say that Amelia with 4 syllables sounds pretentious, just like it's silly to say that pronouncing Carrie and Kerry differently is pretentious. You wouldn't say our English friends are pretentious for speaking the way they were taught, and it's not as though we're speaking with fake English accents to impress people.
Karyn - Since you mentioned it, Amalia is also very high on my list, with 4 syllables and Lia as a possible nickname.
Sushila O'Malley - LOL, I was going to mention the Astird mistake. I kind of suspect they chose that name just so they could make that joke.
Back on topic - I would have been David or Anthony. Neither is a great fit, but Anthony is especially bad (for me). Interestingly, my mom also claimed that she *knew* I was a girl and didn't have boy names chosen, but I found an old scrap of paper a few years ago with lists of names. I would probably pick Jonathan--it just seems like such a comfortable name, and there were loads born at that time, especially in my area (first half of the 80s, NYC). One of the finalists for girls' names was Allegra, but my dad vetoed it as too weird... booooo, I would have loved that. As it happened, my aunt used it for her daughter 6 years later.
KRC--despair not! I agree with what Jennie L3igh said about the relative popularity of the name, and with what you said about the prominence of Jan's baby in the grand scheme of things. I don't think it should make a big splash in the baby naming world, for all the reasons you said. If it is the perfect name for your little girl to be, use it! And in my mind, anyway, I think it's nice to have an unusual name that's still somewhat familiar to people, so it doesn't look like you came totally out of left field. I don't think anyone would seriously think that you named your baby *after* Jan's baby (that would be weird, right?), but maybe if people have heard the name there first, they'll be more inclined to think, "oh, that's a neat/interesting name" as opposed to "huh? did you say Aster? Esther? What kind of wacky name is that?" For the record, having grown up with an Astrid, it doesn't seem like a wacky name at all to me (more a fun, strong, artsy, and slightly quirky name), but I'm trying to imagine others' point of view.
EVie, since I'm the one who first used the word pretentious here, let me clarify--it might seem that way to me if someone who generally had the same accent as I do wanted people to use a different "accent" to pronounce the name Amelia (especially because the 4 syl. pronunciation seems more British/European to me). If they were from someplace where that was actually the standard pronunciation, I certainly wouldn't find it pretentious in the least. Hope that helps.
If I had been a boy, my parents would have named me Joeseph. As my name is Joanna and my nickname is Jo, I feel an affinity toward Joeseph and Joe and would feel comfortable with those if I were male, I think.
I want to thank everyone on the comments about Amelia/Emilia. I think right now we are leaning toward Emilia and calling her Emmy. According to quick research, Emilia is the latin/italian version of the English, Amelia. Although I can't be sure - it seems Amelia is supposed to be pronounced A-meel-ya and Emilia, eh-mee-li-a. I tend to say the lia part in Emilia fast enough that it is more like 3.5 syllables - and I think I am comfortable with that. (I think!) A boy will be Oliver. (Again, I think.)
Amy3 and KRC - I get very nervous when I start hearing a name I like too. So KRC - I completely understand your issue with the Office. However, -I would not worry. I think the name Astrid is great, but like someone else said, not likely to catch on right now.
As for this blog - I have been lurking for over a year but didnt have the nerve to write in until now. What a kind, intelligent and informative group of people. Thanks again for all the input.
Thinking about the Amelia/Cordelia/Julia pronunciations... one of the reasons I don't like the name Amelia is because I really dislike the "meel" part of saying it Uh MEEL yuh. Makes me think of a meal-worm, ew. But I realize that now I conciously say all those names with 4 syllables, because I prefer those pronunciations. And I LIKE to say uh-mee-lee-uh-beh-dee-lee-uh, it's fun that way!
Doesn't endear Amelia to me, but at least it sounds better. I like Cordelia (we were big Buffy/Vampire fans), but not Julia.
My Captcha is Ally Roseberry... kind of a fun name in itself!
KRC - I'm chiming in kind of late to say I think you should definitely still use the name Astrid if you have a girl. I think it's such a beautiful name! I'm with everyone who assured you that it won't jump in popularity - I don't think that the world is quite ready to embrace that one yet. But I understand your anxiety as well. The girl name I've been reserving for a daughter since I was in my teens is Evangeline. Imagine my horror when Evangeline Lilly shot to fame on Lost. I'm waiting to see how it plays out...
As for my alternate name, I am among the ranks of women who would have been named Matthew (1976). I would have been Matthew Douglas - I can see the Matthew being comfortable for me, because it was so common (like my real name, Kristy), but I don't think I could reconcile myself to Douglas. The name that feels like it would be most natural is Christopher, but only because it's so close to mine and I'm used to being called Kris anyway, and because my grandma used to call me Christopher! This from a woman named Frances who grew up being called Frank!
stacy- I say Amelia in a very southern california accent with 4 syllables.
It has never crossed my mind what my parents would of named me if I was a boy. So of course I called them up to ask. My mother's response was "I Don't know" In a very hight pitch voice. She claims they didn't think of a name till I was born. I then asked my father who again said "I DON"T KNOW" In a tone that said "Aren't here more important things to think about'? Of course I didn't get my NE from them. It probably would of been an Old Testament Biblical names since that is what we all have.
My husband's name is Noah and I was told that he would of been Norah if he was a girl. That completely makes sense.
Name watch: I was at the grocery store yesterday ran into a little boy with the name Dash. I thought that was very interesting since it is my cat's name. Also, the cashier had a name I have never seen before.
Bretony Claire- Of course I asked her about it. Apparently her father is a Landscape Architect and Bretony is a plant. Very neat! Her brother also had a unique name of Jedrick. Anyone heard that one before?
KRC-I wouldn't be too upset about the name being on Office. But I DO understand your emotions. I would be throwing a fit too! I am sure the baby won't be on there very much. It is not that kind of show. Plus with the name having the word ass in the beginning, I am sure it won't catch on very fast for Americans since we say it with the long a, emphasis on the ass.
KRC -- In the last thread (or maybe the one before it), someone was asking about the popularity of Astrid and why it spiked a few years ago, and the response was that Astrid was the main character in the film White Oleander, starring Alison Lohman and Michelle Pfeiffer. Now, I'm sure that there were some folks considering Astrid around the time the movie came out who were distraught by the attention brought to the name, and perhaps a few people who met a baby Astrid that year thought, "oh, like in that movie?" But I'd be willing to bet that anyone who met an Astrid now (even if she were born around the time the movie came out) would NOT make the connection to the movie. It was too minor to make a huge dent. And I'd guess that a baby named on The Office is even more minor in the scheme of things than a blockbuster movie featuring a prominent character with the name. So, I'll add my voice to the ranks of those saying you should use the name despite The Office. It's a beautiful name, and I strongly doubt it will become popular anytime soon.
Had my sister, Denise and I been boys, our names would have been Peter and Andrew. I could see myself as either, although it wouldn't be a perfect fit. The biggest difference for me is that both of our middle names are after our grandmothers - Pearl & Irene. That was always really special to me. If we had been boys, I do not think that my parents were going to use my grandfather's names: Leon & Wilfred. If I chose a name for myself now it would probably be Benjamin.
My husband would have been (actually was, for a while) Erin - now Aaron.
All 3 of my sons, Elijah Joseph, Dominic Paul & Theodore Frederick, would have been Miriam - with the middle names Beatriz, Irene &Doris. My girls, Corinne Beatriz & Lucy Grace Irene would have been either Joel or Corwin Paul for Corinne & Timothy or Xavier Frederick for Lucy.
Re: the name Astrid. Please go with the name you love and tv be damned!
I'm another Nicole, and if I were a boy, I would have been Nicholas. I was named for my grandfather, Nicholas.
@KRC - Breathe! Relax! Your little Astrid certainly isn't going anywhere soon. "The Office" is not extremely popular, for one, but more significantly, Astrid's first syllable's similarity to another word will absolutely prevent it from becoming "the next Emma." Astrid is a great name, but at the moment is one that only a real NE could love. If you love it, use it! Odds are you're having a boy anyway! ;)
Re: Pron of Amelia/Emilia. I'm an American in Seattle and I'd say Amelia = Uh MEAL yuh; and Emilia = Eh MEAL yuh. Just a subtle difference in the pron of the first syllable.
Thanks to everyone! I am calming down. I am really hoping that Jan's character and her baby do not appear again significantly on the show this season. It doesn't seem like there is much left for the writers to do with Jan's character.
My baby is not making an appearance for another 5 or 6 months. I'm hoping the name will fade from people's consciousness by then.
I think I say Ah-MEEL-ya with 3 syllables. I definitley say JOO-lee-a and not JOOL-ya. But I can't seem to say Ah-MEE-lee-a with 4 syllables if I try. It keeps coming out sounding like Ah-MEEL-ya with 3.
KRC-
I'm embarassed to know this, but....
years ago, the Roz character on Frasier named her baby Alice, and the Mad About You couple named their baby Mabel (or was it Hazel)?!
Anyway, my point is that while these names are becoming (slightly) more popular Now, neither of these TV babies caused a sudden boom in Alices or Mabels.
I think they're quite comparable to your situation with The Office and Astrid.
I do happen to know one preschool aged Astrid, but she's the Only one I've ever run across, and we are around gobs of little ones.
If you love it; use it!
For silly reasons, I can't help but think "Huge," when I hear Hugo, but I can see how it would fit in with current trends.
J&H's mom:
Even more embarassed to know that the baby on Mad About You was Mabel, and it stood for Mothers Always Bring Extra Love.
Somewhat of a shark jumping moment for the show, which I loved.
J&H's mom, you needn't be embarrassed of your sitcom knowledge around me. I put myself to shame with complete recollection (and rather frequent viewing) of any episode of Roseanne. Well, now you know. ;-)
Hugo took a while to grow on my husband too, but now he likes it. I always thought of it as a literary name, from Victor Hugo, which is why I thought of it and chose it. I am rereading Les Miserables right now, just to relive his masterpiece in case my baby is a boy and gets his name. I realize that it is becoming a more common name due to the Hispanic population and I kind of like that. For some reason, I need my girls' names to be much less common than my boys' names. Anyone else?
J&H's mom,
Yep it was Mabel on Mad About You. Carol Burnett played Jamie's mom, and she used the saying Mothers Always Bring Extra Love (MABEL), and Jamie liked the name, so there you have it :)
Aybee,
Oops, didn't see your post when I posted. Funny, I almost wrote that once they had the baby they "jumped the shark" --- guess we were thinking & writing alike at close the the same time. I thoroughly enjoyed that show in the early years.
"ER" had a huge audience in 1999-2000--but I'm guessing the naming of Nurse Hathaway's twins Tess and Kate didn't make a dent in the numbers for those names. Do any of you associate Tess with that TV baby? Nah.
Same with other ER babies--Reese, Ella, Henry, Joshua, Joseph, and even Cosmo followed the trends, they didn't set them. Same with Astrid Levinson--the name reads as a little offbeat but totally plausible for that character right now. Also, it let the Michael character make the "Astird" mistake, a gag that wouldn't have worked with Molly or Lea or Ava.
I think it was in the last thread that someone posed a question about which names represent the United States.
After the presidential debate this week, I wondered if Joe
might be the quintessential American male name.
Today a Washington Post article said of the name: We hear "Joe," and we know that we are talking about salt of the Earth, and we know that we are talking about America, which is why some countries use it as general slang for "person from the United States."
As for the now famous Joe the Plumber, it turns out that his first name is actually Samuel.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/
content/article/2008/10/16/AR2008101602448.
html?hpid=topnews
zoerhenne: I have no idea what connotations of Damian you're talking about but I know a few folks with that name.
Thanks, guys! Can't believe I forgot that.
Now, if an Astrid shows up on name-trendy Grey's Anatomy, it may be cause for concern!
re: Damien-
I don't associate it with the movies, but I know I've heard comments from others who very much do. But then, I never watch scary/horror movies (too much of a wimp). I don't associate Regan with Poltergeist either, but some people (not anyone here, I mean in some of the other name forums where people are less intellectual about their namings and more... argumentative, shall we say) will pick out any negative thing they possibly can and go from there. Even my own mother, who wanted to name my sister Eric, told me when I announced that would be my son's name, "You can't give a boy a name that starts with a vowel. Boy names should begin with consonant sounds. I'm going to call him 'Ric'." When I reminded her that I nearly had a sibling named Eric, she completely denied it. Now? She denies ever having had that conversation with me. And he is NEVER EVER called 'Ric'. Some just like to argue and dissect.
Loved Mad about You and remember Mabel. I also remember most of the ER babies but can't remember who Joshua and Joseph were.
As far as my comment on Damian, wasn't it the name of the little boy who was possessed by the devil in the movie The Exorcist or am I mistaken?
You know, while I have never seen The Omen (Wikipedia tells me that that's the movie with Damien), I most definitely associate the name with a devil child.
KRC -- It's interesting you note that Hugo is gaining popularity in the Hispanic community because according to Cleveland Kent Evans' baby book, so is Astrid. And, in fact, the only Astrids I've met/heard of IRL, other than my own, are Hispanic.
KRC:
To me, Hugo feels like a very French name, even pronounced in the English HU-go. I looked it up in Quebec and France to see if this association was grounded in any truth and I found that, in 2007, Hugo was #41 for boys in Quebec and that in France in 2006, Hugo was #4. I never would have guessed that it was so high, but I guess that explains my gut reaction.
While Astrid and Hugo are not names that I can see myself using (they just don't feel like "me",) I really do like both of them and don't think that you can go wrong with either. And I love The Office, but would still not associate the name with the show.
Heh, I only just realized why this is...
When I hear the name Astrid, I immediately feel like it is a bright, bold, and strong name... and that is because I associate it with the word "Asteroid".
I also think that it's quite commong to want a more unusual name for a girl than for a boy... just think back to all those conversations about, for example, Hispanic groups in the US giving their sons traditional, family names and their daughters popular American names.
Ditto Karyn on Damien/Damian....
The Astrid I knew had a very Swedish last name, and her sister was named Inga. The young ones in my neighborhood are not Hispanic, either. I think one of them has a brother called Milo--not sure if the other one has siblings.
hyz, I love that you're busy with a newborn and yet still offering your most-welcome insights. Many other new parents have had to bow out...for obvious and understandable reasons. I hope you stick around for good.
Okay, here we go:
A-MEEL-ee-ya (Amelia)
Em-EEL-ee-ya (Emilia)
JOOL-ee-ya (Julia)
Cor-DEEL-ee-ya (Cordelia)
Also, since this is our touchstone: I pronounce Kerry, carry, and Mary the same, and Laura and Lora the same.
[Deep South U.S. background but immigrant household that did not speak English at home. However, please note that I have never, ever heard anyone in my family say the name Amelia, so make of that what you will...]
KRC...I know this probably doesn't help much, but last night when I was watching The Office, I winced when I heard the name "Astrid" and thought, "Ahhhhh...there go the hopes and dreams of some NE [Name Enthusiast]out there in America tonight." And then I had a moment of silence for all the parents with young Astrids or with babies on the way...seriously, I did.
I also thought it was interesting that no one on the show (the office workers) made snarky comments about the name, given that it's not in wide circulation.
Amy3, I agree with the suggestion that many Astrids (and Ingrids, as we've discussed) in this country are Hispanic. And Clementine, thank you for the WHITE OLEANDER reminder; isn't it funny how names can just seep into the conscious and then fall back to the subconscious only to be drudged up again later? I'm sure there are parents out there who love Astrid and who read the book/saw the movie, but don't connect the two at all.
Facts for Astrid: Feels Swedish to me so I looked it up-
2005 Sweden=#72 up 1 from 2004
2007 Sweden=#52 up 3 from 2006
Not in top 100 for Scotland, Australia, Ireland, England+Wales, Canada, or US
Source:http://www.thinkbabynames.com/popular/0/United+States
Thanks, Easternbetty. :) I sit at the computer for work, and this is a nice break. Of course, I have to be more efficient at work now that I have a little one to care for, but I still have to take breaks every now and then! :)
I love the name Astrid.
I do associate the name Damien with evil, mostly because it sounds like demon, not because of the movie.
And I don't know what my boy's name would have been if I hadn't been a girl. I feel like 'Jim' would suit me, but that's probably just because the name is so similar to my own, 'Jill'. I don't particularly like Jim or James, but I feel as though my male-alter-ego is a Jim.
Other websites of interest:
http://www.scb.se/templates/Product____30909.asp
http://www.babynamefacts.com/popularnames/countries.php?country=SWD
http://www.babynamefacts.com/index.php
(This is the main page to #2. It is set up like Laura is doing with her Namipedia). Laura-take a look its cool but they still don't have a map. Yours is VERY cool.
Father Damien (1840-89) is the first reference in my mind-- Catholic priest from Belgium who ministered to people with leprosy who were quarantined on Molokai Island.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Father_Damien
And he was born more than a century before any horror-film Damien, and there are monuments to his memory, and he was beatified by Pope John Paul II in 1995, so... he wins. ;)
In case you were worried that Damien had such "bad" religious connotations that it was unusable, the name also has very very good associations, and I don't think it's irretrievable.
Or you could avoid the whole mess and use Damon instead.
KRC: When you mentioned about how you wanted your girl's names to be more unusual than your boy's names, did you mention that because you've got both an unusual boy's name and a common girl's name that you like (or already have a child with such a name), but was hesitant on using them together in a sibset? If so, I think that it would be perfectly fine to use the names together; although such sibsets do tend to be less common than the other way around it isn't something that is unheard of (I am assuming that the names don't otherwise clash in style).
zoerhenne -- Regarding your stats for Astrid from Sweden, my husband worked with a guy from Scandinavian (can't remember which county, but I think Sweden), and for him Astrid was either the name of a very old woman or a little, tiny baby. I thought that was interesting as it mirrors the experiences we talk about here of having a name reach a certain level of disuse before it comes back into vogue.
hyz -- I second the hope expressed by Easternbetty that you'll stick around, even with a new baby. Your insight is always interesting.
In time, the saintly Damien should surely trump the transitorily wicked fictional Damian-- as a believer in the ultimate power of good, I am sure of it.
However--- When my niece was naming her son, her husband's Italian/Dutch immigrant family was hoping he would be dubbed for his grandfather, as there is a tradition in Italy of naming the first-born son after the paternal grandfather.
Grandpapa's name-- "Damiano". So my niece wrestled with the idea of having a child named Damian, and they eventually decided they just couldn't do it, because of the notorious film/book. So they named the baby "Alexander Damiano", call him "Alex" and it seems to be quite O.K.
Am I wrong in thinking Elizabeth Hurley named her son "Damian"?
It was interesting that some people here have said the opposite-sex name they would choose for themselves would not be the same as the name they would give a baby. That's fascinating. Anyone know why?
The name(s) I would give myself are identical to my favorite names for any baby born today- I don't really make a distinction. In other words, I'd love to be "Barnaby" or "Theo" or "Piers", and would be just as excited to bestow those names on my child...
Of course, how could i forget Father Damien? That's why I know so many Damiens--NameMapper shows the name peaked in Hawai'i.
Eo, although I wasn't one of the people who mentioned it above, my alternate reality identity name would definitely be different from the names I would give my sons. It's not that I wouldn't *want* to be named something like Augustine (one of my current favorites), but I don't think that name would *fit* me now. Part of it has to do with the generational difference - while Augustine might be a fairly trendy choice now (or at least not far out there), it probably would have sounded very out of place when and where I grew up, so I have a hard time identifying with it. I think that names play a significant role in shaping our identities, thus naming a boy Augustine, I'd be confident that my son would *grow* into an Augustine. But for me, a person who has already been shaped by a name very far off from Augustine, I can't imagine it being my name.
Thanks, Amy3. :)
Eo--I can give one answer to your question about alter ego naming, anyway. I think it has to do with the difference between how we see ourselves and what we hope for our kids. Although I hope my child(ren) will be like me in many ways, I also hope they will be better/different than me in some ways. Therefore, I think they might pull off or grow into a certain name that wouldn't be a good fit for me. I picked Alexander immediately as my alternate name. Although it's #11 now, it was significantly less popular than my name (Alicia) when I was born, so I still have a gut impression of it as a classic and familiar but not overly popular/banal name. It sounds friendly to me, smart, and a bit athletic/outdoorsy, possibly artistic, and neither particularly introverted nor extroverted. It feels like a comfortable fit for me. The Al- beginning doesn't hurt, either, but that doesn't totally explain the choice. I like Alistair better than Alexander, but that feels a bit too suave for me. My favorite name for a hypothetical son is Silas, but that feels a bit too hip. To bring it to a base level, Silas sounds like the head of the environmental group or literary magazine in high school, and I was only a member, not the ringleader in those groups, if you know what I mean. :) Since we're breaking out the sitcom knowledge, anyone remember that episode of The Simpsons where Lisa joined an environmental group and had a crush on its leader, the guy with the blonde dreds? His name was Jesse, but I think he could've been a Silas. lol. My other boy favorites don't feel quite right either--August and Rowan (also too hip/cool), Oliver (too high fallutin', maybe? while Ollie is too chummy), Owen (too gentle). I hesitated a bit when picking Ivy for my daughter, because I worried that she might have to be a bit hip to feel comfortable with it, and what if she wasn't? The concern arose because I could see myself having some of the other names we were considering (Adele, Eleanor, Sylvie, even Averil), but not Ivy. The other names seemed softer, less pointed. Of course, once the name is attached to an actual person, a lot of those fears disappear. The name seems right on her, and she will grow with it, whoever she becomes. But I already am who I am, so some names are right out.
Oops. That was a novel. Sorry! And I really should be working now, anyway. Back to work for me.
My name as a boy would have been Robert John, same as the following two sisters. My brother finally got the Robert John when he was born, and my sense from hearing the story as a child was somehow that he was the long awaited boy-child that no family is complete without....Or maybe that is just me being the snarky oldest sister picking on the over indulged only son? I cannot imagine myself as a boy at all, and unlike alternate girl names I cannot come up with a name for my male self.
I like the name Astrid, I picture a blonde midwesterner descendent of a long-ago pioneer migrant (to America). I haven't heard it at all in Aus...and anyway, the English original of the Office will live longer in people's memories surely? Speaking of unspeakably awful remakes of TV shows for the US market- what on earth happened to Kath and Kim??
Real kid name alert- in a museum in Sydney last week, a two year old RUPERT! and Mum didn't have an English accent either. He had two older sisters and I think one was something like Jane, but I couldn't make out the other girl's name no matter how hard I tried. Rupert, Peregrine et al were fantasy names I wrote on my wish lists but was never brave enough to use in public.
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