What do these men have in common?
Millard Fillmore
Woodrow Wilson
Strom Thurmond
Before you start contemplating political philosophies, I'll throw in a fourth: country singer Dierks Bentley. Any guesses? All four men's given names are their mothers' maiden names. (Some were technically bestowed as middle names, but that's what they're known by.)
Once upon a time, a surname-as-first-name wasn't just a matter of style. It was a matter of familial connection: honoring forebears, strengthening ties, preserving traditions or advertising notable relationships. The practice was especially familiar in the South, but you can find maiden-name-names all across American history.
Today, modern naming patterns are bringing a whole new twist to the surname namesake. Because today, mom's "maiden name" may simply be her name. Let's say you're Jane Smith, wife of John Jones. You're expecting your first child and facing down the separate surname dilemma. Do you just choose one parent's surname? Hyphenate the two? Use mom's surname as a middle name? Give daughters mom's surname, while sons get dad's? Or even create a new name for your kids...Jonesmith, perhaps? I have friends who have done each of the above. But one of the simplest solutions is to use both names together as a full name: Mr. Smith Jones.
It's not for everyone. First off, some surnames are best left last. (I don't imagine my daughters will be naming any babies Wattenberg Jones.) It can also be confusing: I was once introduced to a young "Smith Jones" and, assuming that was hyphenated, thought I had totally missed his first name. What's more, it can leave you in a bind when it comes to naming subsequent children.
Yet putting the extra surname first also has some real advantages. It feels "fair." It makes clear both parents' relationship to the child, and even subtly clarifies the parents' relationship with each other. And it's a proactive step to merge two family traditions rather than just handing kids a double helping. With surnames popping up across the baby name landscape, it may be an appealing option to more and more families.
Comments
I just came across a sibset (3girls, 1boy). The boy is Matthew. The girls are Elizabeth, Justine....and Seraphena!
I just read that Gwen Stefani named her new daughter Zuma. Somehow I don't think it will be as popular as Kingston.
Oops, just realized it's a boy. I don't know what I was thinking.
oh, that makes me happy. my husband is worried that no one has that name. is he called rutledge, or has it been shortened to anything?
Amanda, you were thinking that Zuma Nesta sounds like a girl's name - and I agree with you!
I was just going to write to ask whether Halcyon was a boy or a girl and I decided to look it up myself. Halcyon is a girl, but more importantly, not only does that woman have Helena, Theodore and Halcyon, she also has Xanthe and Hero and was expecting twins in what I assume was June of this year!
I must know what those twins are named.
Does anyone else remember the alcopop called Zuma? From the mid-nineties?
Anyway, on family names as first names: my grandfather was John [his mother's mn] [ln] and my dad was a junior who went by his middle name since the age of 5. When I came along, there was a last-minute decision against naming me Jennifer Sarah and I got the same middle name as my dad. Which I have never liked, mainly because my dad uses it as his first name. Also because my sister got a frilly non-family mn and I didn't see why I had to be lumbered with mine. Once as a teenager I was griping about all the other Sarahs I knew and my dad asked why didn't I use my middle name instead, and I stared at him and said I didn't want the same name as him!
As an adult, I have had trouble with people assuming it's a double-barreled surname (to the point I changed credit cards once, because they couldn't correct their records and get my middle name off the card). Other people have assumed my middle name is my maiden name, thereby calling my husband by the wrong surname, which annoyed everybody.
In school I knew girls named Tucker, Aidan, Blair, Brandeis (Brandy), Michael, Lee-Michael, Stevie and Dabney for various family names, and of course several Treys, Skips, Jebs and other III/IVs who had nicknames based on their initials etc. They all used to complain about being mistaken for boys based on their names. The Skips and Jebs didn't like their juvenile nicknames, but needed to differentiate themselves from their dads somehow. I also heard of a set of twin girls there named Turner and Samantha, which seems too confusing; one super-feminine name and one super-surname with no hint that she was a girl as well.
A colleague's cousin named her baby Donald Donaldson (well, another Scottish equivalent) which we all agreed was taking the fondness for her married surname too far.
Valerie - for your friend, what about Dara? It means oak in Irish and can be used for boys and girls.
KRC- I found the article re:Amanda Foreman. The twins are as above Xanthe and Hero. The article does state she was due in June but then also says she will then have a family of 7. She has 5 kids plus the 2 adults=7. Here is a link to the article for those who'd like to see her take on big families in Britain:
http://www.amanda-foreman.com/dailymail1.shtml
Brunk de Loof - You have provided me with endless giggles. Bc of your name I have the perfect mental picture of what you must look like/act. ie: Brunk's (in my case) have a very distinctive body structure - rather short and stocky and thick ankled. Then adding the "loof" gives me this hilarious idea of faux snottiness bc a Brunk couldn't be snotty of they tried. Very Bubbly outgoing people.
Enjoy your stolen name!!! :)
Thanks, Sarah, I passed on your suggestion. It's a beautiful name.
Sooo, I know that Trey comes from the idea of third, but Skips and Jebs? Please explain! I'm from the UK, so I plead ignorance...
Happy to entertain, Jessica.
The little boy Rutledge in my neighborhood: I sometimes hear him called Rut1ey--but remember, he's a preschooler. I suspect he'll revert to Rutledge or maybe use Ledge or Ledger come the school years. (Don't know his last name or whether Rutledge is a family name. Pretty sure it's not mom's surname, though.)
I have to admit, I like Amanda Foreman's children's names. I don't think I would use Halcyon and certainly not Hero- too hard for a girl in today's super-hero obsessed world. But the others are great, and I think all five harmonize, but are not 'matchy'. Are they all of Greek origin? I like that as a theme immensely.
Surnames in my family tree:
Hansen
Stark
LaBonte
Vardsveen
Morris
I could see using Hansen (although it's my maiden name and "too close" for me to use personally), and LaBonte might be interesting, but really nms.
I have a friend who named her dd DeHavelyn, pronounced like Olivia Dehavilland. My friend's mother loved OD as an actress and gave a daughter Dehavilland as a middle. My friend took it (her sister didn't use it) and spelled it differently. I love the name and would consider it (you know, if I was actually HAVING more kids) if I wasn't so close to my friend.
I had always wanted to give a son my maiden name of Jensen. I thought it would be a great name, my husband did as well, however, his mother hyphenated his name when he was 1. Needless to say a last name as a first name, followed by a hyphenated name, may just be a bit too much. I even thought it was too much to give Jensen as a middle name.
I also thought of using my mothers maiden name as a girls name, but I couldn't decide on the spelling. Do you keep it traditional and be accused of the dreaded creative spelling or change it to the traditional spelling and lose the family connection. Ultimately I had to reject the wonderful name of Edin as well, because I just couldn't answer the question.
Zoerhenne - thank you for that correction. I must say I'm a little relieved to hear that woman does not have 7 children. So the twins are both girls?
I think it is strange to give your child your "maiden name" (I dislike that term) as a first name when it is still your surname. I have a fairly common British WASPy last name similar to Whitman and several people have suggested to me that I should give a son my surname as a first name. But I would never. In addition to not being much on the surname-as-first trend, I am stuck on the fact that that is still MY surname. Also, my husband's last name is another British WASPy surname and the child would sound like a law firm.
I intend to give all of my children (we don't have any yet) a first and a middle name, plus my surname and my husband's surname. I assume they will use my husband's surname (and not mine too) as their surname, but I will give them all 4 names, so they can pick whatever they want when they get older.
Valerie:
In my school, Jeb was the initials of a III (John Edward B-something, or something). There was an Abe which was an approximation of his initials too - he was a V! There were others boys who also went by their initials but I have forgotten.
Skip was a IV, Charles something something, and he explained it once: the nicknames in his family went Charlie, Chuck, Chip (his dad) and Skip. Even the teachers used to tease him about how he'd drawn the short straw. I wonder what he goes by now.
Basically it's what happens when the names repeat down the generations and the parents decide on a nickname for the kids, which sticks longer than it should.
At risk of stirring the pot, I do think the nickname issue is something for the parents to consider when they discuss how they can 'shorten' their kids' names. I think cutesy nicknames can lose their allure, especially if used outside the family. And as for surnames for first names, I think you can all imagine what the girl named Tucker in my year went through. Especially when the banana boat song was re-released.
My niece is a Katie (3 today, actually) and I think there will be times when she's older and she will wish she could be a Katherine.
That said, my niece named Trudi will probably never get mad at her folks for not naming her Gertrude!
One other thing just came to mind: another family at my school, the boy in my year and his older sister had the same middle name: Eden. He got teased about it once and leapt to its defense: It was a tradition in his mother's family -- it was not only her middle name, but the middle name of all her siblings, and of all the sibling's children as well (so every single last one of his cousins had Eden as their middle name).
I have never heard of a family tradition that I liked better.
there is a sophmore girl in my sisters high school named jensen,but i think in might be spelled jensyn or somthing like that. we thought it was wierd when she moved here, but now i really like it.
new baby annoument in local paper: emme louise. sibs abigail, jacob, and lily.
i love the idea of my maiden name of any of my family names being incorperated into my (future) childrens names.
unfortunately, several of them are fairly popular first names that are now on the way out. others are just too awful imo.
plus i dont know yet if they would have my husband's ln or not.
on my side
nunn
logan
barker
carlson
wilson
mcnaught
darst
brooks
on his side
rutherford
bowling
livingston
wilson
watson
hodswattle (no, i'm not kidding.)
My children will have Sharland in their family tree, which I've always thought was gorgeous - anybody's welcome to pinch that (for a girl, I think, in the vein of Charlotte), as surnames as first or middle names are not my style.
I think I'm going to have to name *something* Hodswattle. Cat? Fish? Dog? Iguana? hmmmm.....
Zoerhenne-Thanks for that article. I enjoyed it immensely.
KRC-May I humbly ask why you are relieved she doesn't have 7 children? If you read the article she is very happy to have a large family.
another amy....
youre welcome to it. lol
i think it might suit an iguana
perfectly. his great-uncle richard sort of looks like one...
I plan on naming my first boy Elliot, which is my SO's mother's maiden name.
Been away for the weekend-cathcing up!
KRC-Glad to have helped. Rjoy-Glad you liked the article.
Guestie+another amy-Hodswattle sounds like an iguana's name to me too LOL!
Sarah-My cousin and I both share the same middle name. We were named after our Aunt who died when she was young.
OT-My captcha name today is Pukow McCloskey.
Anyone for that one??ROFL!
I'm planning on using my mother's "maiden" name for my daughter's second middle name. We are favouring Vera for her first. I rather like the reactions I've been getting from people when I tell them. Most people over 30 are horrified, but yes, the teenagers love it. I would love more feedback on it. Thanks in advance!
we are thinking of using the maiden name of my great aunt for our son:
Traver
it would be pronounced TRə-ver like the Travers Stakes.
kinda seems like a name that should already be out there but isn't.
we are thinking of using the maiden name of my great aunt for our son:
Traver
it would be pronounced TRə-ver like the Travers Stakes.
kinda seems like a name that should already be out there but isn't.
adam, hope you're still reading this thread as it seems to have been abandoned for the new one!
But I had to say I think using your aunt's surname is a wonderful idea, and "Traver" is great sounding. Strong, but sensitive. Nice for both a little boy and an adult.
A small number of people may mis-hear it as "Trevor", but I don't think that should be a concern. The family connection to Traver will outweigh any other considerations.
I love it when people use the many unusual, and under-used, surnames out there!
thanks, eo.
we already have a son named Cian which many here in the South hear as "Ken".
some other of our names:
Teator
Budd
This story is semi-related, but I love it and wanted to share.
I just read Dan Savage's book "The Kid" where he writes about adopting with his partner. They do an open adoption and have the hardest time ever coming up with a last name. They looked at this solution, hyphenation, blending, surnames in their family trees and every other possible option.
Their solution? They gave their son his birth mother's last name. So, in the end, the child had a name given to him by each dad and a name given to him by each mom.
I love this solution so much it makes me want to adopt just to avoid the last name fight with my husband!
I named my son Jones after a good friend who's last name was Jones and we called her Jones, Joneser, Jonesie. If my next child is a girl, she will be named Parker Jane, mostly because I am a crazy Spiderman fan (Peter Parker, Mary Jane) but I can work it in as a family name (my hubby's fav aunt last name is Parker).
My son's name fits him well, it was pretty common as a fn in the 1800's.
We have a 3-month old named Theodore, nn Theo but, ironically, my other 4 children call him Theodorable. But I like Teddy too.
KRC, I have a daughter Corinne, pronounced Cor-IN.
Also, last names available in my fam & dh's (excluding his surname and my maiden):
Dumont, Salvas, Gagne, Levesque, Elliott, Vincent, Routhier, Grenier, Yasky, Zimmerman, Corwin, Johnston, Aracano, Conforti.
This isn't just for dead white men --- Reese Witherspoon's first name is her mother's maiden name. (See http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000702/bio)
I'm a woman who received her mother's maiden name (Britt), and her first name as my middle name.
Growing up, I always wished for a super-feminine name like the Natalies or Julias or Sarahs in my classrooms. I dreaded when teachers would do that first rollcall at the beginning of the school year, and look visibly surprised that I wasn't a boy! I'm now in my mid-twenties and regularly receive mail addressed to Mr. Britt MN LN, but I just laugh about it.
But it all worked out. I'm getting married in a few weeks and it was nice to be able to drop my middle name in favor of keeping my MN ... that way I'll have names from each of my family, since my FN remains my mother's maiden name, my MN will be my maiden name and my LN will be my new married name. All bases are covered!
I also gave my maiden name to all my three kids. i am hispanic and my husband is french with a very french last name, but the two flow very well together. it throughs some people off sometiems but we love it.
My brother and I were both born in Germany and we were both given fairly common names (Sascha & Nicolai) that were consistent with the regionality of our immediate family; however, upon moving to the States, the uniqueness of our fns [our middle names were not suitable alternatives either], was impressed upon us by way of our primary classmates and|or teachers that either couldn't spell or pronounce our names. (One of my third grade teachers was fervently convinced that the spelling of my name did not require a "c" while to another I was "the German boy in row three" for most of our first month together.) Nonetheless, we survived without any lasting marks but our shared experiences galvanized a mutual agreement that none of our children would be tasked with carrying our first names as their first names.
Fast forward 35+ years and we've both grown into our names and resolve, but in different strengths: my brother is fine with his given name provided that it does not escape the safe shelter of those legal documents that support our daily lives and I have learned to anticipate and actually enjoy the pregnant pause that follows my over-the-top-good-ole-boy self introductions. (Wha...what!...how?!) Guaranteed good times!
Anyway, all of the above is a meandering path to this last part: I'm very fortunate to have four children that enjoy the uniqueness of their first and middle names:
- Roman Sascha, (despite my fn being the diminutive form for Alexander, the prospect that it stood a very good chance of being shortened to "Alex" kept it off the short list for us but that decision inadvertently opened the door to Roman as an attractive fn);
- Alexandra Elaine (her mothers' fn);
- Brontë Maree (fn was lifted from a character in the movie, Green Card, and mn is my mothers' fn);
- Amelia Holland [no particular reason apart from that we both liked the relative but friendly obscurity of both of these names;)]
Cheers!
softer names for boys ,i have never thought about this ,looks nice
I would love to use this idea. None of mine really work though. Any ideas of how to incorporate them even a little?Please help.
peterson
lemaster
person
lebsack
paulsen
Kind of hopeless i think. :-(
Valerie:
Re: "Graff" - this is my maiden name, which my husband and I have taken as hyphenated with his (scottish, Mc-something, one syllable). Outside of family, I haven't met anyone with the name. I always thought about using it for our (future) children but all the teasing I got in school would have relegated it to a MN only (think: Graff-iti, pie-graph, autograph - I had a GG-uncle actually named Otto Graff. Tragic consequences).
Hair Removal
Back Hair Removal
Best Hair Removal
Bikini Hair Removal
Laser Hair Removal
Electrolysis Hair Removal
Epila Hair Removal
Face Hair Removal
Hair Removal Cream
Hair Removal Wax
Laser Hair Removal
Bikini Laser Hair Removal
Laser Hair Removal Cost
Laser Hair Removal School
Permanent Hair Removal
Threading Hair Removal
Home Hair Removal
Home Laser Hair Removal
Hair Removal Prices
Sona Hair Removal
Hair Remover
Male Hair Removal
Waxing Hair Removal
Nads Hair Removal
Hair Removal Products
Hair Removal Treatment
Hair Removal Review
Hair Removal Boston
Hair Removal Atlanta
Hair Removal Houston
Hair Removal Utah
Hair Removal Charlotte
Hair Removal New Jersey
Hair Removal System
Laser Hair Removal Prices
Laser Hair Removal for Men
Hair Removal Cost
Hair Removal for Men
Post new comment