Baby names are topping the world's headlines today, and not in a happy way. The global news story comes from the Indian state of Maharashtra, where a renaming ceremony was held for 285 girls whose given names, Nakusa or Nakushi, translate to "unwanted."
The girls, mostly from rural families, were victims of a cultural preference for sons. This preference can be woven deeply into the fabric of a community, incorporating concerns from the spiritual (e.g. only sons can pray for the souls of dead parents) to the pragmatic (sons are responsible for the financial support their extended families; daughters, once married, support their husbands' families.) The girls' parents expressed their disappointment in having unwanted daughters in a literal and lasting way, in names, in the belief that this rejection would encourage the gods to grant them a future son.
I believe that the global outrage about this story has several levels. First, it shows how important we all believe names are. It's no secret that countless babies born around the world are, sadly, unwanted, and suffer for it. Yet there's something shocking about recording that fact in the child's name. It's a denial of her very humanity, reducing her to nothing but the unwantedness.
A name is a child's most basic birthright, cost-free and life-long. Turning it into a weapon against her seems a dire kind of emotional abuse, declaring to her and the whole world that she deserves nothing, is nothing.
Looking more broadly, the reaction to the story reflects the way names are a window on a society's soul. In fact, the same regions where son preference has produced this extreme name phenomenon show other, even deeper effects. Prenatal sex selection is skewing sex ratios in the population, and girls receive poorer nutrition, education and health care. The news-making renaming ceremony is shining a spotlight on a broader problem.
To be fair, their society does recognize the problem and is working to combat it. It's important to note that the renaming ceremony was the product of a long joint effort between government and advocacy groups to find all of the young Unwanteds and persuade their parents to allow them to choose new names.
Which brings us to a third, tricky level of emotional response to the story: response to numbers. If this story had been about one or two children, it would have been a "news of the weird" item. We would have shaken our heads in dismay at the parents, as individuals. The number 285, though, shifts the focus and blame to the broader society.
There's no question that this naming story does point to broader societal issues. The name Unwanted couldn't have been accepted without a cultural setting where sex bias was prevalent. Yet I'd like to put the large-seeming number into perspective. Accounting for population size, birth rates, and the cross-age sample, those 285 Indian children correspond to about 3 babies a year in the United States. Each year, at least 50,000 different names are used at that level or higher in the U.S. If we accept the name Unwanted as a reflection on Indian society, then what names must we accept as a reflection on American society?
While no American names carry the stark message of Unwanted, a great many do send signals about our culture, values and dreams. Here's just a small sampling, all used at at least the level of Unwanted, most much more often. Do you read messages in them? And what conclusions do you think are fair to draw?
Money
Riot
Chaos
Chardonnay
Tequila
Lexus
Porsche
Infiniti
Dillinger
Gotti
Capone
Shooter
Cannon
Gauge
Supreme
Perfecto
Maximum
Messiah
Nautica
Chanel
Timberland
Armani
ESPN
Anakin
Thanos
Kraven
Sephiroth
Lucifer
Comments
I posted about this a while back, but a Turkish friend of mine told me about the girl's name Yeter (meaning "enough"). She claims the connotation is "enough already" and the name is often given to the youngest child in a large family. But imagine if you were the younger sibling of a Yeter ... that's almost as bad as being named "Unwanted."
Generally I would say it's unfair to draw conclusions from such a small percentage of the pop., but what happens if you add up ALL such names in the US? It's still a teensy percent, but might be slightly more statistically significant. As far as messages, some of the names Laura lists might explain why Americans have the highest self-esteem relative to actual achievement!
Hm, they seem to apply that Americans are possession-happy (or at least obsessed with guns, expensive products and themselves).
I simply can't imagine naming a child Messiah. What would that do to their psyche?!
Although maybe it'd be better to err on the side of grandiose self-worth with Messiah than awful self-esteem with Unwanted? Interesting.
Sad story. I would wonder whether some of those names are spelling errors and give the parents the benefit of the doubt. However, several of them ARE spelled correctly and like Jessica said above, scream out that Americans cherish material possessions and have expensive tastes. I think this is a fair summary of how manufacturing and technology have changed America over the years. We used to have people named several virtue names back 100-200 years ago. Things like Patience, Prudence, and Thankful were quite popular. Boys were named after George Washington as a way to worship the hero. Nowadays, our heroes are quite different. Laura touched on this a few threads ago. People now name their children ESPN and Madden as well as Edward, Bella, and Cullen. They name them Mercedes, and Porsche, though I'm not sure if there have been any Xbox's or Wii's. There are even foreigners who upon learning of Facebook decide it is the perfect name for their child. Times they are a changin'.
Apparently there's also a Indian TV series with a lead character named Nakusha. Nakusha is played by Mahi Vij, a popular model turned actress, so I wonder if some of the girls were named after her character?
In the long run it doesn't matter -- the show has only aired since 2009, so the character's name is most likely a response to the phenomenon and not the source.
Can you imagine the uproar if the US government lead a campaign to change the names of 285 American children? Ron Paul's head would literally explode!
There is a Senegalese name (Bougouma, if I recall it correctly) that means "unlikeable" or "unwrthy" or something similar. I was told it is a name given to the child to protect it: If the bad spirits/demons/etc. hear it is unwanted, they won't be so prone to get to it... So the parents give this name to make sure their child doesn't get hurt.
I don't think it's fair to lump Thanos in with the names you've surrounded it with. I know a Thanos, and it's his name because he's Greek, not because his parents were nerds interested in the macabre. That's not the same as naming a kid for a Final Fantasy character.
Jefferson Davis's middle name was Finis, supposedly because, as the 10th child born to his parents, they hoped he would be the last. He was.
Messiah doesn't bother me as a name at all. I'm sure people are named Messiah in honor of the Messiah, not because the child is expected to be the Messiah. I've met people similarly named Jesus, Emmanuel, Salvatore. No problem, really.
There's also all the Mohammeds in the world; certainly they're named in honor of the Prophet, not expected to be him. I've also met a man named Prophet. I asked him about it, and he said that it's a big name to live up to. But he was a good person, I thought he wore it well.
Jiminy Cricket, I thought something similar when I read that ^_^ Sadly, I doubt that a government-forced name change will alter the parent's feelings toward the girls. The girls will still grow up feeling unwanted. I think that having the TV show featuring a gorgeous model named Unwanted would do more good to change the hearts of the people at large. After all, a demon=child named Damien gave his name a boost because he's evily cute.
If India has that many girls named Unwanted, I wonder what other names they have on the same level? As Laura said, we don't have just one way-too-worldly/violent/egotistical/fantasy-worshipping name, we have plenty of each category (no offense to Thanos' parent's). And how do they weigh against other, less offensive names on the same level of occurrence? I'm sure we have babies named Peace, and maybe India has girls named Cherished.
Thanos doesn't bother me, I'm not even really sure what it is referring to here. Like another poster said, it is an actual Greek name. It's like Mercedes, an actual Spanish name that is also the name of a car. Neither bother me, even if the intention of the namer was the product, not the actual meaning of the names.
What about the 10-year-old I met whose given name is Razor. Talk about trying to steer a kids future!
There are opposites to the name Unwanted: Aimee/Amy (beloved) and Unni (Old Norse, also beloved) comes to mind.
A relative of mine was going to be christened Leonard Stone, but on the way to the church his mother decided to add a middle name, Arthur.
L.A.Stone. Brilliant - except I cannot remember if they did have another one actually.... oops.
I would have to defend the name Cannon. It was only in the context of the other names on the list that I could surmise something objectionable about it. In LDS circles it is a fairly common surname turned first name. Actually, one of my cousins has a little Cannon and I never thought twice about it.
I wouldn't say these names describe Americans as a whole. I'm pretty certain these names come from parents who are lower-than-average income, and lower-than average education.
This is off topic, but I was hoping to get some baby naming advice. My husband and I are down to a short list of boys names and I wanted to get feedback on some of our choices.
We really like Malcolm (nickname Mal). However, when we mentioned this to a family member she thought that the name would always bring to mind Malcolm X, and that it would be peculiar for us to give it to our white baby. I wouldn't want to give my boy a name that most people see as disconnected to his appearance; that would be an annoying thing to hear over and over as you're growing up. So, 1) when you hear Malcolm do you think Malcolm X, and 2) do you think Malcolm is predominately an African American name?
Another name on the short list is Grant. I like it a lot, but the hard /t/ at the end makes it very formal. Any nickname ideas for Grant?
Thanks!
I know a little baby born a few months ago named Malcolm. I think it is adorable. He is white, for the record. However, I'm not sure about "Mal" for a nickname given its meaning in other languages and as a prefix in the English language.
I also like Grant, but I say go with the name you love.
Not what you want to hear, but yeah, I always think Malcolm X when I hear Malcolm, and would naturally assume the bearer of the name Malcolm was African American. Kind of like I would for anyone named Luther.
What about Mel or Mac instead of Mal?
"Malcolm", to me, means 1 of 4 people, and yes, Malcolm X is one of them; the other real person is Malcolm Gladwell, the writer, who is biracial (I think, but am not sure, that he racially IDs as black; he's definitely not white). The other two, though, are both white (and fictional): the title character of the tv show "Malcolm in the Middle", and Mal Reynolds, the ship captain from the show "Firefly". I'd say the last two are evidence that "Malcolm" in pop culture is not so strongly associated with Malcolm X as to make naming a white child "Malcolm" seem odd to most people. and I have met a lot of people who assume that Malcolm Gladwell is white; whether this is because he is Canadian, light-skinned, or they assume black people don't write for The New Yorker or something, I do not know. Regardless, the name association with Malcolm X isn't strong enough for a lot of people for them to assume that Gladwell is also nonwhite.
Not sure if that helps. But I personally would name a son Malcolm without worrying about racial misidentification (I am white). It's a Scottish name in any case, and I don't doubt the Scots will carry on with it, without regard to famous Americans. :)
Malcolm does not scream "x" to me but does lean slightly black. I like Grant but that leans a bit British to me (is this what you meant by formal?). I would be wary of the nn Mal as les said. I would use Mac instead. Some other names to consider:
Mitchell; Miles; Mackenzie
Griffin; Graham; Brent
@Allyson with a y, "I wouldn't say these names describe Americans as a whole." That's exactly the point Laura is making. When you correct for proportion of babies born, etc., the girls named "unwanted" in India also are statistically a small group (relative to overall population) and I'd be willing to bet their parents tend to fall into a similar economic or social grouping as opposed to Indians who are less likely (or not likely at all) to give their daughters this name. So taking this small sample of names and extrapolating to an entire society is problematic, just as taking the names Riot and Chaos and extrapolating to all of American society is problematic.
@cc_sadie, I *love* Malcolm and would not expect a baby of any particular racial background to be attached to it. I do think the nn Mac is better than Mal. I know one kid named Grant. He's 14 now and wears it well. It certainly doesn't seem too formal on him.
cc_sadie,
1) when you hear Malcolm do you think Malcolm X
nope.
2) do you think Malcolm is predominately an African American name?
definitely not.
i am obviously aware of malcolm x, but for whatever reason (maybe because i was aware of the name long before i knew who the person was) it does not make me think of malcolm x, and i definitely don't think of the name belonging to any particular race.
if i had to pick an association, i'd have to say captain malcolm reynolds from firefly, mentioned above by laura v. he is white. oh, and he also goes by "mal" and i didn't think anything of it. ::shrug:: i guess i'm kind of laid back when it comes to these sorts of things (but ridiculously anal about others!).
A quick note on Thanos & Cannon -- these names, like many others, can definitely come from varied sources and impulses. E.g. some girls given the old and traditional names Tiffany and Mercedes are named for the brands, some arent.
However, the baby name Thanos did not reach measurable levels in the U.S. until it became a comic book and video game villain, and regional usage of the name Cannon correlates strongly with the use of other gun-related names like Gunner, Colt, Remington and Gauge, so I thought it was reasonable to include them in this context.
My husband, who has deep New England roots, had a collateral ancestor named Waitawhile. Needless to say, she was one of the younger children in her large family.
@cc_sadie: For me, Malcolm associates with Scotland before Malcolm X. And I actually love the nickname Mal.
I've just now caught up with the thread in the last post and was so bummed to hear that I missed out on the Astrid discussion! Ever since I discovered the Beatles at age 12 I've been wanting to give that name to a future daughter. My husband likes it, but has reservations about how it might carry through school, given the first-syllable emphasis. So, I'm wondering if the moms of Astrids out there could share whether this has in fact come up for you.
It doesn't help that a couple of years ago, it appeared on "The Office": Jan Levenson named her daughter Astrid and the Dunder-Mifflin staff mistakenly spelled it "Astird"--or something similar that made it sound like "ass turd." Funny, I must admit, but a terribly unfortunate association for the name.
Malcolm does not sound "black" to me, despite Malcolm X. It is a Scottish name, and that's what I think of first. I guess, essentially, that I wouldn't be at all surprised either way, by a Malcolm with siblings Callum and Alasdair, or siblings Deshawn and Malik--both are perfectly consonant to me.
Oh, and I meant to say that I like Grant a lot, too--just as much as, if not more than, Malcolm. Both sound smart and handsome to me. And I think Mal is ok as a nn despite the meaning, but I might prefer Mac.
I'm not sure how to take the American names listed. Of course you could say that our society is materialistic, but you could also say that we are very aspirational and therefore want good lives for our children. The very nature of a materialistic society means that we associate wealth with good things. As far as the evil names go, I'd say it shows the U.S. isn't a terribly religous society as we look at them almost as characters in a story and not real evil.
I'm another fan of Mal and Malcolm. I don't really associate it as African American (not nearly so much as Martin). I'm a total geek and think immediately of Malcolm Reynolds from Firefly. He's a perfect hero character...well, he's alright.
Cc-sadie
I always said that I would never name a kid of mine after a TV character, but then I was sorely tempted by Malcolm, nn Mal, after Firefly's Mal Reynolds. His general badassery turned that name into something so cool to me. So that's my first impression of Malcolm, nn Mal. I hope you use it! My husband vetoed it for my two boys :/
1) when you hear Malcolm do you think Malcolm X, and 2) do you think Malcolm is predominately an African American name?
Absolutely not. And in fact it's a pretty popular name around New England with no racial identity attached of any kind. It definitely rings British/Scottish to me.
But even if some people think of Malcolm X first, so what? I don't know what famous person from history people think of when they hear my kids' names and I don't care. And the fact is that Malcolm X was killed 46 years ago ... put your family members' comment into that perspective and listen to your own voice.
ESPN really blows my mind.
Malcolm to me sounds Irish or Scottish or Gaelic of some sort, just the "Colm" ending gives me that vibe. I think it depends when you were growing up, I grew up way post-Malcolm X/civil rights but if you were growing up during the 60s you'd probably have a stronger association with Malcolm X. I don't associate Malcolm with Malcolm X at all, the first thing that comes to my mind when I hear Malcolm is like other posters have said, Captain Malcolm Reynolds (played by Nathan Fillion) in Firefly. - chances are growing up a child named Malcolm born around now won't come across a lot of people who associate Malcolm with Malcolm X except grandparents or history junkies!
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does anyone know has the babynamewizard posted about the name "Win" or "Wynn" before? Just curious this post reminded me of the lead(ish) singer of the band Arcade Fire whose name is Win Butler (BN Edwin). But Win itself, I thought it was an interesting name, and I really like the sound of it and it sort of fits with Finn and Quinn but clearly it has a very strong meaning behind it. too much for a kid to have the name Win?
@jb112, I'm one of the moms to an Astrid here, and I think mine may be the oldest among the posters (at least that I'm aware of). At 10 years old, my daughter has been called Ostrich and last year was told she has a "bad word" in her name, but it's never been a persistent source of teasing. She's in 5th grade so I anticipate the worst of name-related teasing will occur this year and for the next 2-3. By high school I think it should even out.
Sometimes she wishes she had a more common and more popular name (she used to call herself Sarah a lot when she was about 4), but when I was kid I wished my name were different, too (and it was common and popular). I know she likes her name and she knows we chose it because we love it for lots of reasons (the Beatles connection being one of them). She has a very "normal" middle name, if she ever wants a fall-back.
As for the reference in The Office, since that's not really a show most kids are watching, it's never come up. And I'm guessing (hoping?) any adults who are aware of it have the good sense not to say anything.
My thinking has always been that it may be a challenging name to grow up with, but she will spend most of her life as an adult.
Essy01:
There's a currency strategist of some renown by the name of Win Thin.
He's quite successful and has a Ph.D., so he turned out just fine.
peasoup17,
"He's a perfect hero character...well, he's alright."
ha-ha! nice one.
cc_sadie: I remember when Malcolm in the Middle came out, I thought it was a weird name for a white kid, but since then I guess I've gotten more associations with the name than Malcolm X. I think of Malcolm Reynolds from Firefly too. I wondered if the nickname Mal in Firefly was supposed to be symbolic or something. I mean going with the meaning of "bad." I definitely have positive associations with Mal from that show though.
I feel like I've heard/heard of Wynn also. Or maybe heard it as a middle or surname and thought about the meaning. I guess I have to say I like how Wynn is a little subtler
Thankfully the number of girls given the names meaning "unwanted" is indeed statistically small, but on the other hand, the 285 girls at the renaming ceremony are the ones whose parents agreed to rename. How many more were not allowed to attend?? As Laura pointed out, this name issue points to such deeper problems related to gender preference in many parts of the world.
My Dad's name was Malcolm, born in 1906, and my brother (1934) is also a Malcolm. He goes by "Mac". I don't make any connection between these two (white) men and Malcolm X ever... although since we're family it is a little different.
And then there was the character Malcolm in Jurassic park, the nerdy guy played by Jeff Goldblum.
I do not associate Malcolm with Malcolm X or have any preconceived notions of what race a baby with that name might be. I like it--underused but classic. I know a small boy named Grant and think that's a good name too. He does not have a nickname.
while we're throwing them out there, bruce willis' character in the sixth sense was also a malcolm.
i looked up malcolm in namepedia to see the real life/fictional malcolms listed, but i am not familiar with many of them. however, there were *many* and while some of them were definitely black (malcom-jamal warner (the cosby show!) and denzel washington's son), many of them weren't (malcolm wilson, former governor of new york, malcolm cowley, american writer). it certainly seems like it spans races from this list.
i wonder if it is somewhat generational, like essay01 said. i was born in 85, so by the time i was cognizant of malcolm x, it was quite a ways in the past, but if you were growing up around that time...?
I wonder if the assumption that a Malcolm will be African American, which I strongly have, as mentioned above, is both generational and regional. I was also born in the eighties, so on the generational theory, I shouldn't really think of Malcolm X first. BUT I also grew up in a mixed neighborhood in Milwaukee - and the think about mixed neighborhoods in racially charged areas is that there isn't actually a lot of mixing. So for me, Malcolm is a black name, period, like Luther or Raymond. But if you are in New England, or California, it's probably completely different. In fact, I know it is, as I don't live in Milwaukee anymore. So, maybe, consider your region?
While we're talking about names associated with particular demographic groups, what do you think about Octavia on that front (and in general)? We are considering that name now for our December baby (Cora and Willa, the prior two top contenders, just weren't doing it for me--too concerned about popularity, not different enough). I did not associate it with any particular group but have now been told it is commonly used in the south, where it perhaps started as a name given to slaves by their owners.
jane 6, used to be 7:
huh, that's very interesting to me. maybe you're on to something. neither luther or raymond is a black name to me either. for reasons i can't pinpoint, luther is actually "very white" to me. which...now that i'm thinking about it doesn't make sense, since the most famous one is probably martin luther king jr. hmm. anyway, that's a really interesting perspective. it is definitely different where i am.
kern,
i like octavia! i guess the only one in the public eye is black (the actress from the help, but i am blanking on her last name), but the name feels more...ancient roman to me. does that sound stupid? i just mean that it makes me think of octavius, and then that makes me think of men in togas. i mean all of this in a good way: it retains its flavor. anyway, i like it. it's distinctive and smart.
emilyrae - I was so glad to see you reference the Cosby Show since that was what I thought of when I heard the name Malcolm and I was surprised no one had mentionned it. I was a kid in the 80s and watched way too much TV.
If anything, I associate Malcolm with Scottish redheads. Grant is a good name too and needs no nickname, in my opinion.
Octavia is an ancient Roman name to me. Nice name, but I prefer Cora and Willa.
Jane7-I like your analysis. I also think it is very generational and a bit regional. I was born in the late 60's. (emilyrae-I didn't remember you were so young :0) I lived in a very white bread New England community. We only had one black family in town and I think the boys name was Charles nn Chuck. So I am no judge of other races' names. However, from media sources, it just gives off a vibe.
kern-Octavia feels very regal to me. It's like a queen's name or something. Cora and Willa seem much more country (backwoods) than Octavia. Now please don't think that either is a bad thing, it's just how they seem to me. For alternates:
Cora/Willa; Nora; Phoebe; Ivy; Matilda nn Tillie; Sadie
Octavia; Beatrice; Amelia(e); Cecelia; Michelina
Wilhemina nn Willa might work though as well as Cordelia nn Cora
Could Colm (a legit name on its own) or Cole be feasible nicknames for Malcolm?
Kern, while I wouldn't be surprised if "Octavia" was used by slave owners in the US South -- they gave slaves lots of Roman names -- it certainly didn't either start there or end there. Octavia was one of the wives of Marc Antony, way back in the day.
My primary association with it is Octavia E. Butler, an African-American writer, and my favorite author.
@Kaye, by noting the statistical smallness of the girls named "unwanted" I wasn't trying to suggest there weren't still gender-related issues to address in India and elsewhere, only to point out that it's difficult, if not impossible, to universalize from a small group to a larger society.
@Kern, I like Octavia and get a distinctly classical vibe from it.
Ohhh, I love Octavia! To me it seems like the name of a Georgette Heyer heroine - I suppose it might actually be one. British, romantic, and distinctive, all at the same time.
Perhaps it's because I'm Canadian, but Malcolm is Scottish first and foremost in my mind, but unless the person's name is also obviously Scottish, I wouldn't make any assumptions regarding race. I love the name and had it on our shortlist for boys. I liked it because it didn't seem to need a nickname. I agree with the earlier poster who suggest Colm or Cole for nn alternatives to Mal or Mac. I also like Grant.
Octavia feels like a name that would show up on one of those lists "If you like X how about Y or Z" with X being Olivia and Y being Octavia. It's uncommon but a known name with a long history. I had no idea about it being connected to slavery. Does anyone know why slave owners gave their slaves Roman names?
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