Baby name tradition, I need to break it but it will probably hurt a lot of feelings.
I'm Greek Orthodox, the baby name tradition is you ALWAYS name your children after the paternal grandparents then if you magically have 3 or 4 the wife gets to pick a name. I grew up in America, the tradition of always naming the children after the parents isn't as prevelant for Greek-Americans the past ten years. None of my Greek-American cousins followed the tradition partly because they didn't marry other Greek people.
That being said I married a Greek man and live in Greece now! We are expecting our first child. We always said we wouldn't follow that rule. My own husband said that his parents names are too common and he wanted something more unique, like an Ancient Greek name.
Sadly my father in law is ill and things have change my husband expects our first child regardless if it is a boy or a girl to be named after his father. I understand he wants to honor my father in law, but really that is not what we agreed upon before marriage! I adore both his parents, I really do they are the sweetest loving and most generous people. I would love to honor them but I don't like their names. My father in law is named George and my mother in law Dimitra/Demetra. And befoe you say use their names as a "middle name" in Greece we do NOT have middle names. Your middle name is your birth father's name. It shows who you belong to. So even if you are a girl your name will be "Maria Stephano Papadopoulos"....we are still a very patriarichal society! And having a girl named four names is a little ridiculous in terms of a legal name in this country. Our last names our usually 13 letters long!
I thought I'd come to terms with it, I sometimes think I'm being petty. But the more my body changes and I realize I'm going to go through 20-30 hours of labour, I will be the primary care giver and won't have a say in my own child's name for the rest of my life drives me freaking nuts!
We don't know the sex of the child yet (My husbadnt doesn't want to know the sex of the baby because he believes it is bad luck!) He thinks it will be a GIRL. I have no clue.
I tried to compromise, I told him if it is a boy we can name him George but I pick the girl names. He said no because he is certain that it is a girl. I'm so frustrated, I refuse to name my daughter Georgia, it is not a beautiful girl name. I already hate the name George for a boy, a baby with the name George sounds like a 50 year old business man to me. Naming a girl Georgia is just awful in my mind. My cousin with the name Georgia hates it. We went to a baptizm last summer where the girl was being named Georgia and my husband even said that they shouldn't baptize the little girl with a masculine name. I guess he's forgot about that.
I reminded him that George is the #1 Greek boy name in this country. We have over 14 George's in our social circle. We never refer to them by the name George because that would be confusing, so we refer to them by their last name like they are in the military. I don't want my son to be refered to by their last name in a class room for the rest of his life. My husband agreed that yes, that would be confusing but too bad this is tradition.
I am so anxious at this point over the name thing. The best part is that out of our friends, 3 couples who had babies last year all stuck to the tradition of using their grandfather's name! I know none of the wives are happy about it even at 7 and 8 months old they still call their boys "babe" because they don't like their names. It is considered rather insulting if you don't stick to this tradition. I don't want to be the "Bad Daughter in Law" but I didn't think I'd have to follow this rule before we got married!
The only thing that gives me solice is that in Greece you don't have to pick your child's name when you give birth. You can wait up to a year until baptism ....so perhaps by then my husband will change his mind. My only fear is that my in laws are probably assuming I'm going to follow tradition. I hinted that I would like other names and all I got were dirty looks. My mother and father have said that I have to folllow this tradition, even thought I reminded my mother how much she restend my father for not letting her name any of us. She herself said "too bad, I suffered it you do too." Imagine your own mother hating your name!
Okay rant over, thanks to anyone who managed to read past the first line. I appreciate it.
Fri, 01/22/2016 - 6:39am