Can't agree on a girl name!

I thought we had our names down to these three: Violet, Hazel, or Autumn

My husband just informed me that he's not sure he likes any of the three. So now we're trying to see if there's a name out there we haven't considered yet! He states all the names I like are 'weird' and I think most the names he likes are either 'boring' or they're names that our friends and family have already used. We differ in that I really want a less popular name and he doesn't pay attention to that at all.

Some of the names I like: Vera, Thea, Leila, Isla, Elowen, Eloise

Some of the names he likes: Amelia, Lily, Claire, Ashley, Abigail

Any suggestions that we may not have come across?  I'm due in 3 months and I'd at least like to have it down to a couple names we both love!


February 12, 2018 5:11 PM

what about Leah, Aisla, Ailsa, Elodie, Eliza, Amy, Emily, Emma, Lucy, Ruby, Clara, Audrey, Gabrielle, Camilla, Milly, Lucinda, Charlotte, Juliette, Mabel, Leisel, April, Avril, Kira, Anthea, Althea, Lisa

February 12, 2018 7:05 PM

Thank you for your list. I'll definitely run these names by him!

February 12, 2018 6:58 PM

I completley sympathize with you- my husband finds all of my names "weird," as well! I know that can be very frustrating. I see some overlap in your lists (at least in my own opinion) of taste... I could easily imagine Vera being on his list, as it seems more traditional to me. I also think Isla seems to fit in with his list, as it has that same soft, feminine appeal as his other names. It also seems like you all like a few nature themed names (Violet, Hazel, Lily)- so I wonder if you may be interested in Iris or Rose? 

Some other suggestions:


Amalia (instead of Amelia)











February 12, 2018 7:04 PM

Thank you for your reply! 

I wish he liked Vera or Isla. In fact, he hates both of them. And Vera has been at the top of my list for years! He doesn't like Isla because he thinks people will have trouble pronouncing it. We contemplated Iris, but considering I'm an optometrist, it seemed too cliche.  I'll have to show him the others on your list.

February 13, 2018 12:39 PM

Interesting- I would definitely think Vera is pretty straight-forward (I guess depending on where you are!). I think you are right about Iris, knowing your profession ;) That would be a good intro for a lot of jokes. Good luck!! 

February 12, 2018 7:31 PM

Based on the sounds and style of his names: 

Juliana, Jillian, Gloria, Mariana, Virginia, Tatiana, Liliana, Holly, Bethany, Felicity, Joy


Based on your preference for nature names:

Coral or Cora, Florence or Flora, Ivy, Willow, Reed, Dahlia


Sounds like a tough situation! Good luck and keep us posted! 

February 13, 2018 12:33 AM

His style seems feminine and nature-inspired, where yours seems quirky vintage. Here are some options to consider or to bridge a gap. Hope this helps!


Arden, Anya, Aurora, Adeline, August, Amity, Bianca, Bridget, Camille, Cleo, Celeste, Cecily, Daphne, Dahlia, Delilah, Eden, Estelle, Elise, Felicity, Fiona, Gemma, Greta, Halley, Hope, Helena, Holly, Ivy,  Jade, Johanna,Juniper, Juliette, Keira, Lindley, Liana, Leighton, Lucille, Luna, Linnea, Lena, Marina, Marie, Marceline, Maya, Marion, Naomi, Nina, Odette, Olive, Phoebe, Piper, Quinn, Ruby, Rosalie, Roxanna, Stella, Simone, Sasha, Selena, Scarlett, Summer, Savannah, Tessa, Thalia, Tatiana, Tabitha, Violet, Vivian, Veronica, Viola, Willow, Whitney

February 13, 2018 5:53 AM

Do you think you could agree on one person's choice with another person's choice of nickname? Your list seems a little more vintage and adventurous, his is more in safe territory. An immediate thought was Lillian (sounds very vintage to me) with the nickname Lily, or Elowen/Eloise called Lola or Lulu, or Abigail (his choice) with the more vintage sounding nickname of Gail instead of Abbie.

Or how about Amalia, Emilia or Amelie instead of Amelia?

I would also maybe try and go on coffee dates at the local children's park (depending what kind of naming climate you live in) and eavesdrop on the names...if you're visibly pregnant this shouldn't be too creepy. When I take my daughter to the park, I'm always intrigued by the range of names we come across (everything from Finley for a girl to Leona in one day). It could help him get used to a range of sounds and see that even fusty-seeming names feel different when attached to a three year old.

February 14, 2018 12:16 PM

I heard someone calling to their Fionnuala at the park last year and wondered if they spelled it the traditional way or something closer to the pronunciation, but I want really in a place to ask. You definitely hat lots of names! And the husband might notice how often the Olivers and Liams and Noahs have to look up to see if they are being called for or some other kid with the same name. 

February 13, 2018 12:03 PM

Thanks for all the great advice! I should mention, we have an almost 2 year old son named Gavin. We were Team Green with him and had no issue coming up with a few boy and girl names we liked. Boy names come much easier to us though (or rather, we agree on them easier). I think the fact that we know the sex this time puts too much pressure on us to have the 'perfect name'. I also refuse to use a name, or super similar name, to any children our family or friends have used. Unfortunately, when you're in your mid 30s, most of your friends have kids and a lot of names have been taken. My husband has no issue using the same name as someone we don't see on a regular basis but I really want something different. We'll both end up compromising a bit eventually but I think we're both holding out, hoping the other one caves first! ;) 

I'm going to run these names by him in the next couple days and see if we can find a good middle ground name! I appreciate all your help! 

February 13, 2018 1:10 PM


Ava, Olivia, Aubrey, Natalie, Samantha, Julia, Lauren, Laura, Anna, Chloe, Lillian, Kayla, Brooke, Hayley, Makayla, Kaylee,  Ella, Eva, Katrina, Fiona, Imogen, Sabrina, Sabine,  Nola, Kirstin, Annabel, Bonnie, Elaine, Elsie

February 13, 2018 2:22 PM

I had a few thoughts as I was reading through the thread.  First, I wouldn't count Iris out, especially if you make a point to play up the non-eye related associations.  For example, you could fully embrace the nature/botanical connection and simply laugh off any eye-related comments you get as just a happy coincidence.

I would also encourage you to rethink your rule about not using any name that's been used by anyone in your circle.  It'll open you up to new possibilities.  Personally, I would avoid names already in use in the family or my very close friends, but it's unlikely that anyone in your daughter's life will know or care if her name is similar (or the same) as the name of your former co-workers daughter.  

Have you considered compromising by using a longer version he likes with a shorter nickname you like (or vice versa).  For example, Vera could be a nickname for Veronica & Veronica seems like it would fit quite well with the names on his list.

I'll also suggest looking for names that sound like more popular "boring" names.  For example, if he likes Laura or Lauren, perhaps you could convince him on Laurel.  May & Maeve also came to mind.

I do notice a bit of a nature/color theme in your names.  Perhaps Ruby, Scarlet, Magnolia (Maggie), Poppy, Flora, Ivy, Pearl, Olive,  Rose, Daphne.  Some other, more random ideas include Felicity, Cecily, Vivian, Verity, Audrey, Sabrina, Fiona, Gemma.

February 14, 2018 12:08 PM

Hazel was my number one name last time that my husband vetoed once we found out it was a girl. We headed to the hospital assuming she would be Lucia Violet, but she didn't look like one at all. She ended up being named Amelia Eleanor

Seeing so many of our names in this post made me wonder if you guys had considered Lucia? It ended up not being right for us but I still love it.

February 15, 2018 1:37 AM

Your styles are not actually that different! (He likes Lily, you like Leila...)

Here are some that may bridge the gap:

































By anap
February 18, 2018 6:08 AM

Seems like you are both very close with your choices of Leila and Lily. I would focus in on those two similar names and see if you can't work out something you both like. How about Lilia? 


February 19, 2018 6:31 AM

My daughters middle name is Aysha. It’s not too common, but not weird either. 

 is hard to agree on a name, I loved Ava and my hubby didnt, we ended up calling our first Holly. Which I love, again it’s not super common but it’s not to weird either. 

Just keep names on your list as sometimes it just takes you a while to get used to them, 3 months is plenty, our second we only found the name the night before!