Two girls- but not twins

Hello all! After struggling with infertility for 3 1/2 years, I am currently 15 weeks pregnant with a baby girl! We’ve had her name, Lindy Austen, chosen for years, so that is definitely set.

 

However, we chose to become licensed foster/adoptive parents while we struggled to conceive. We were blessed with a newborn baby girl THE SAME DAY we found out our IVF was a success! The opportunity to adopt this little angel is looking more and more promising, and we couldn’t be happier. We are trying to come up with name options that sound nice with our other daughter’s name.

 

 

We would like honor my husband’s grandma by incorporating the name Jane into our adoptive daughter’s name. Right now our two favorite options are Thea Jane and Jayna Danielle. What are your opinions on those names? Do you have any other ideas? Thanks in advance! 

Replies

1
January 27, 2019 4:36 PM

I like Thea Jane best.  Jayna Danielle is lovely too.  2 great choices. Congratulations

others Janelle, Janessa, Janette, Janella, Janina, Janine, Janetta, Janna, Janiah, Jenna, Jean, Shavonne, Joanna, Johanna, Yana, Siobhan, Sinead, Sheena, Shauna, Gianna, Zhana, Jessie, Janeen (same meaning as Jane or containts Jan in the name)

2
January 29, 2019 12:02 AM

That's so exciting!  Congrats!

I think I like Jayna best with Lindy.

3
January 29, 2019 12:08 AM

is austen going to be bubs middle or last name? personally i think youve chosen beautiful names, but i cant help but make a connection to "jane austen", as in the author. there could be names that include jane in the name (such as janet) but dont sound like jane and therefore avoiding having that reference to jane austen. some suggestions to go with Lindy Austen:

taya jane

theodora jane

taliah jane

thea janelle

jana danielle (pronounced yah-na, but honors the name jane)

 

what is your style of naming? narrowing that down might give you a good starting point for other name inspiration

 

4
January 29, 2019 4:09 PM

Yes, that's a good point about Jane Austen. If Austen is the surname, I'd avoid using Jayna as a first name. Jane in the middle would be less problematic, but still something to be aware of (most people would make the connection, I imagine). But there are plenty of other options for honouring a Jane - Jean, Joan, Janine, Joanna, Jana, Janelle, Jennie ...

Also, is Lindy the full first name or is it a nickname?

I really like Thea so I'd say go with that, but I'm just not sure it's a great match for Lindy. The two names feel quite different stylistically. But it's not a huge mismatch if they are the two names you like the best. 

5
January 29, 2019 5:34 PM

I really like Thea Jane. I think Jayna Danielle is also nice, and a good choice if you want the honor to be more front-and-center. Thea "fits" with Lindy in the sense that both are short and sweet, with a nickname origin but standing alone very well. Jayna "fits" with Lindy as a more contemporary-sounding name with only sporadic use in the twentieth century.

If Austen is Lindy's middle name, I actually think Jane and Austen middles make a sweet connection for not-quite-twin sisters, assuming you're a fan of the author. Some of the strongest relationships in Austen's works are between sisters, and there's even a theme of fostering and "chosen" sisters running through her life and, to a lesser extent, her works. I do think if Austen is the surname that Jayna Austen is not great.

6
February 3, 2019 8:21 PM

Thank you to everyone for your ideas and input so far! Here is a little clarification:

- Lindy is baby #2s formal first name (after my Grandma Linda). Austen will be her middle name (after my husband). Lindy was a good compromise because it has that classic feel I prefer, yet the modern inventiveness my husband likes. It also is very versatile and will grow well with her. I’ve had people say Lindy Austen sounds like a doctor, author, and singer/songwrite. 

- My husband and I have pretty different taste in names. If it was up to only him, our foster daughter would be Raya Jane. If it was up to only me, her name would be something like Rona or Margaret. We both like Cassidy, but that is her social worker’s name. 

 

I hope this helps! Again, thank you for your ideas!

7
February 4, 2019 3:53 AM

Does your foster daughter come with a name which was given to her by her birth parents?

I think that Lindy's name, first and middle as well as last, honors her ancestors and the story of how she joined your family (via passing on the genetics from your ancestors). 

I kind of like the idea of having your other daughter's name reflect the story of how she came to join her family. The fact that Cassidy is the social worker's name is, in this context, a plus rather than a minus. I'd also try to leave the name she was born with in there somewhere, perhaps in the middle name spot if it's really not your style. I think the only reason not to do so is if she came from an international setting where her name was randomly assigned by an orphanage, but no matter how unable to parent her birth family is, I'm guessing if they gave her a name they gave it with love. You took your daughter in as a foster child, where the goal is reunification with birth family, and although that goal might not come to fruition I think you might still have a next-best goal of her birth family getting their act together enough that they can play some role in her life someday while you are her parents. Even if they don't, the act of naming her was one parenting act which they maybe were able to perform with love, and I think I'd want to honor that unless there were major extenuating circumstances involved. I think that the issues of navigating "virtual twins" are complex and I'd want to be intentional about naming to validate your foster daughter and her future feelings about the issue.

8
February 4, 2019 4:29 AM

I agree that it might be nice to keep some aspect of her birth name (or barring that, perhaps the social worker's), but I think it's also a nice idea if you can incorporate a name from your family, however loosely inspired. Especially since your biological daughter will have two family-inspired names, it might make the adopted "twin" feel herself less your daughter than the one who is genetically yours.

If there are no other family names you like, I think you can be very loose about it (Poppy to honour a grandfather, Thea to honour anyone whose name starts with a T). The stories you tell about the names are probably more important than their actual similarities.

9
February 4, 2019 6:52 AM

Don't let the social worker's name throw you.  If you like the name, use it.  Cassidy-the-name will be in the child's far longer than the social worker.  Our younger son was given the name of my husband's boss.  They had a quick chat (this is not an honor name!) and my husband took a little gentle ribbing, but that's the end of it.

I do like Thea Jane the best.  Jayna is a name that always gives me trouble because you can also spell it Jana and pronounce it several ways.

Congrats on the two girls!

10
February 12, 2019 8:33 PM

Lindy & Millie

Lindy & Molly

Lindy & Maeve

Lindy & Shea

Lindy & Haven

Lindy & Maisy

 

11
February 13, 2019 12:07 AM

I like Thea Jane the best with Lindy.

I also vote in favor of keeping a part of her name to honor her birth family or the story of how she came to join your family. I like Cassidy. Or you could go with Cassandra or another variation.

Congrats!

12
April 3, 2019 5:44 PM

Hi everyone! Thank you for your ideas and advice! We finally decided on the name Danica Jane for our to-be-adopted daughter :) Danica is after my dad (Dan). Plus we like how it has the same meaning as her birth name (Star) and it sounds good with Lindy since they both have a d, n, and short i in them. Thanks again for your help! 

13
April 3, 2019 6:15 PM

oh that is lovely and love the special connections with your dad and her birth name

14
By Eko
April 3, 2019 8:01 PM

Lindy Austen and Danica Jane is lovely together! I love how you tied everything together and gave both daughters equally significant names.

15
April 4, 2019 4:36 AM

Wonderful choice with wonderful meaning!

Best of luck with the pregnancy and adoption!