Ayaka
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My first name is Elizabeth. It's one of those few "timeless classics" that everyone claims to like... but I never really have. As an adult I can appreciate its classic qualities, but as a girl, I hated it: the tongue-twister of heavy consonants, the conservative stuffy Queeny image, and most of all, the unsexy nerdy nickname Liz which has dogged me forever! As a kid, I really wanted a softer, more feminine, more contemporary name - Amanda, Laura and Melissa were my favorites then. (The first two I still like, Melissa not so much anymore.) In my teens and 20's I preferred names that were more unusual and striking. Nowadays, I might choose something like Julia or Claire - all the good qualities of my own name, but a little softer, a little fresher, and no obvious nicknames. On the other hand... liking or disliking your own name could say more about one's self-image or self-esteem than it does about the name. Who's to say that if I was born a Julia, I might not have disliked that just as much, and want to be Elizabeth?
Wow - a very convincing argument! I can't help but agree. Probably most of those who visit this blog are parents, overwhelmingly concerned with naming our babies. But we shouldn't forget there's a whole generation coming up who are choosing their own identities, and re-naming and re-branding themselves online. 'The Situation' is a great, in-your-face example of the post-modern self-chosen brand/handle/name. In a way, I think it's a sort of counterpoint to Laura's post about The Names You Choose Mean More Today Than Ever Before. Kids these days are pigeonholed by their parents' choice of names, which are unlikely to represent their own tastes, personalities or aspirations. Fortunately, young Oliver and Addisyn and Nevaeh and Mary-Faith and Daquarious can all start to publicly re-brand themselves as soon as they're old enough to use social media...
I'm not sure why you'd want your daughter to have a name that's falling in popularity, rather than a name that's rising... Choosing a name that's rising in popularity means most of those that share your daughter's name will be younger - and as an adult, she'll appreciate that name's more youthful image. Choosing a name that's past its peak means she'll share her name with mainly older women, and the name will age her. I know a lady named Jennifer who must be close to 60, and the name suits her well - it sounds bright and youthful amongst all the Barbs and Pats and Sues. However I doubt that most 20-something Jennifers feel the same way.
I think most parents consider Kate and Katie as nicknames, not full names in their own right - at least here in North America. Even if US parents decide they want to name their daughter Kate after the new princess, they're most likely to put Catherine/Katherine or Katelyn/Kaitlyn on the birth certificate. A spike in newborn Kates in a published baby name list would probably indicate a growing acceptance of nicknames as full names, more than it would the popularity of Kate Middleton (or Kate Gosselin, perish the thought). I agree with those who suggested that Catherine, not Kate, is the name to watch (again, in North America - not sure about the UK or elsewhere!). Check out the NameVoyager for Katherine and Catherine. Katherine has been pretty steadily popular through the 20th century, peaking in the 1990's. Catherine peaked 100 years ago and has been in steady decline since the 50's, and steep decline over the past decade, slipping from #86 in the 90's to #177 now. Probably parents avoid the C spelling because they prefer the nickname Katie, and Catherine is more associated with the very baby-boomer era Cathy. But now... with a Catherine/Kate so much in the public eye, I think a lot of parents considering Katherine/Kate will look again at the C spelling. It seems a bit fresher and more distinctive. I'll watch for a big dip in Katherines and a modest (but not enormous) bounceback for Catherine in 2010 and 2011. On the other hand - the British Royal Family haven't had much influence at all on American naming trends for quite a while now... we certainly aren't overrun with children called Harry, Beatrice or Louise!
Wow... who'd have thought so many Name Enthusiasts did improv...? How cool is that? I did improv for a couple of years, in a group that was at least 3/4 male. I recall the guys' go to name was Larry. There was ALWAYS a Larry! I tended to fall back on Fred or Frank for the guys - I guess you'd call them Mid Century Everyman names (little Tommy and Sue's Dad, perhaps). We almost never used male names common to our age group - probably because there was usually one in the room, and using a classmate's real name was sort of taboo, somehow... For the other women, I tried to be more creative and use names that suggested a character to me. But I do recall one girl complaining to me, 'How come you always call me Sharon?' I have no idea why, I never even noticed I was doing it, I guess she looked like a Sharon. (With heartfelt apologies to any Sharons here... to me, it's a loud, 80's-hair cougar name.)
I'm in Canada, and Thomas is quite popular here: #19 for boys in 2009 (though it was #1 in mainly French-speaking Quebec, which I'm sure skews the national stats a little). I know a couple of young Thomases, but - like ajg's son, and the Tank Engine - they seem to be called "Thomas" all the time, not Tommy. I guess the nickname sounds too dated for modern parents. Another one I've noticed is James - everone seems to call their sons "James" now, where they would have been Jamie a generation ago, or Jimmy two generations ago in the MCNC heyday. All this makes me wonder if we're not headed for a big mid-century retro nickname comeback for boys in a few years. Retro nicknames certainly seem to be back in a big way in the UK. Billy, Bobby and Charlie are sounding fresh and spunky again...
Like so much else these days, I think Little Johnny and Little Susie, the classic Mid-Century Normative Children, are really calculated marketing tools. In this case, aimed squarely at the Baby Boomer demographic (or even their parents, the seniors who gave their own mid-century kids those names). They exude nostalgia for a kinder, simpler, more virtuous time, usually tied in to a commercial or socio-political message. Little Susie would love this wholesome baby doll... thanks Grandma! Little Johnny can't play outside because of the violent drug gangs... what is this world coming to? I've noticed that commercials and articles aimed at real modern parents never choose to call their fictional children Johnny, Bobby, Susie and Betty anymore. Marketing is too sophisticated for that - TV commercial children now all seem to be Aidan, Emma, Owen, Lily etc. And when they start marketing 1980's childhood nostalgia to us Generation X-ers, I'm sure it'll be Little Jenny/Becky/Amy and Little Danny/Robbie/Mike.
For those wondering if Kate Middleton will become Princess Kate or Princess Catherine... Not likely - not yet anyway. The tradition is that the Queen will give Prince William a dukedom on the occasion of his marriage - Duke of Cambridge, Duke of Sussex, something like that. (There are lots of dukedoms, it seems, that the Royal Family can use as they wish.) Kate would then be Catherine, Duchess of Whatever. Much nicer than being "Princess William of Wales"! We saw the same thing when the Queen's son Prince Andrew married Sarah "Fergie" Ferguson - she never became Princess Sarah, Andrew was made Duke of York and so Fergie could then be Duchess of York. It's a nice wedding gift from the Queen so the bride doesn't have to be "Princess His Name". Now, when Prince Charles becomes King, Prince William would most likely be made Prince of Wales (traditional title of the sovereign's oldest son), and then Kate would be Princess of Wales just like Diana was. (Diana was never properly Princess Diana - she was Diana, Princess of Wales). (And for something completely unrelated... I love Sylvianne! I've never met one, but I read a book with a character by that name as a young teen, and loved it, and the name has stuck in my head ever since. Lovely choice!)
Though I already nominated a name (Kurt), I'd like to throw in a vote for Esperanza as well. Great pick - definitely a name-related story that resonated around the world. I'd forgotten about that one, but it does certainly seem NOTY-appropriate! Wouldn't be surprised to see a bit of a spike in the name Esperanza when the 2010 popularity rankings come out next year, especially with the large Hispanic population in the US. Regarding Lisbeth - did anyone else punch it into the NameVoyager and discover it had a sudden spike in popularity in 2003 (ranked in the 700's) and then drop back out of the Top 1000 the following year? Any ideas why?
My Name Of The Year pick would be Kurt. As in Kurt from Glee. The reason being, in the past month or so I've heard three seperate people - including my 13 year old, and an obviously gay couple in a restaurant - use Kurt as slang for gay/effeminate. As in, "OMG he's a total Kurt". This for a name that most people would have considered ultra-macho a year ago. Now there's a "dramatic change in the name's usage or social meaning" for you. Not that I think Kurt will be shooting up the baby name popularity charts though. (Leave that to his co-stars Finn and Quinn.) Of all the suggestions above, I think Snooki is the one the greatest distinctive zeitgeist... but it's actually just a nickname, I don't think anyone has actually ever named their baby that. (Laura, please reassure us that Snooki does NOT figure on any recent popularity lists, anywhere!)
Just got myself to a computer with speakers (my work computer is an antique) to check out the Fast Draw clip. What a great video, I really enjoyed it! (Somehow I pictured Laura as a blonde though... must be the name!) On the other hand... hasn't the trend toward unusual, creative and pop-culture-inspired names been going on for quite a while now, even when the economy was good? Leafy: I had no idea you were from New Zealand. I wonder... are the baby name trends there completely different from North America? Are there very popular names in NZ that don't show up on the US stats at all? Or has the modern mass media made it all pretty similar? (Please tell me your Kiwi kindergartens aren't filling up with Madisons, Mileys and Nevaehs...)
Alivia is an alternate spelling of Olivia?! I'm not sure I'd even recognize it, it looks so different without its O! I'd think it was Alicia with a typo (C & V are keyboard neighbors...) Anyway... I wouldn't say I pronounce it A-livia or OH-livia... it's more like "uh-LIV-ee-uh" with the accent on syllable 2. The O is just a basic unstressed vowel sound. If I were trying to pronounce it very clearly, I suppose I'd use the same O sound as 'olive' or 'Oliver'.
Mirnada: You have a great selection of names here! My favorite of the lot, actually, is Anya Fonten0t. I agree that Fonten0t is a rather formal sounding name (very classy, actually!), and to my ears, a nice, clean, bright, fresh, 2-syllable name works best with it. A longer, heavier FN like Josephine, Matilda or Claudia would make the full name quite cumbersome. With that in mind - aside from the bright and charming Anya, my favorites on your list are Lena, Thea and Clara (or perhaps Claire, if your husband isn't a Clara fan?). Jocelyn is a nice choice too, and doesn't sound dated at all to me. Other possibilities... Alice Fonten0t Audrey Fonten0t Daisy Fonten0t Ella Fonten0t Isla Fonten0t Jade Fonten0t Kira Fonten0t Lila Fonten0t Lydia Fonten0t Maura Fonten0t Maya Fonten0t Nina Fonten0t Ruby Fonten0t Sylvie Fonten0t Zoe Fonten0t
Leafy: What wonderful names you have on your list... too bad it's such an awkward sort of surname to match with! Clementine Leaf: leaf of the clementine tree? Scarlett Leaf: autumn colours tourist brochure? Sigh... My favorite (aside from Theodora nn Thea, very charming!) would be Elodie, which is strikingly bright and cheerful. I also like Amelia with your surname. Delphine is lovely but I don't care for the repeated F and long EE sounds with your surname (ditto for Sophia - though Sophie would flow better, and you do seem to like French names). Delilah Leaf is awfully L-heavy, a bit of a tongue twister. So - another vote for Elodie. As for the whole Mrs. Hisname Lastname thing... ugh! I can't believe people still think that's appropriate in the 21st century. But that's just the sort of thing my mother would get worked up about, addressing envelopes with a copy of Miss Manners Obsolete Etiquette Guide in hand. Does anyone under 60 really care if their mail is addressed with a title like Mr. or Mrs. or not? And more importantly... why should arcane rules of address etiquette from the 19th century be more important than actually asking your individual correspondents how they wish to be addressed?
I have to agree with Peony's well-stated point about the injustice inherent in the patrilineal tradition, but I can also see where k8sky was coming from when she said that keeping one's father's name is really no more progressive or feminist than adopting one's husband's name... both are patrilineal male-line names, after all. We just don't have a tradition of matrilineal female-line surnames. On the other hand, I don't think it's necessarily always wonderful from the man's point of view, either. Nowadays, almost no one bats an eye if a married woman keeps her own birth name, or if a child has a different surname from her mother. There's very little stigma attached to it anymore. I can't imagine a North American bride in this day and age who doesn't regard keeping or changing her surname as a conscious choice to some extent. But for guys? As my husband pointed out to me, there's still a lot more stigma attached to a man who changes or hyphenates his name, and most guys probably feel that it's not an option for them at all, given family, social and professional expectations. Maybe some of the guys on the board could back me up on this, but... I think that nowadays, the patriarchal naming structures of the past are falling apart, and it's us women who have the greatest flexibility and freedom of choice with surnames.
What a fascinating discussion! I've really enjoyed reading everyone's thoughts on the surname topic, and diverse ways of dealing with the challenge. It led to an interesting conversation with my husband last night, which I thought I'd share..... Now, as I mentioned in a previous post, I changed my name when I got married, for reasons that seem a bit frivolous when I think about it... my maiden name was awkward and had been an easy teasing target, while his name was nice and familiar and easy to spell - and I was just at a place in my life where I was happy to reinvent myself. (I never felt pressured to change it - in fact some of my friends tried to pressure me not to, saying it was un-feminist - but it was completely my personal choice.) So, last night I asked my husband how he would have felt if I'd kept my maiden name, and he told me he'd be completely fine with it... and that he'd often considered changing his own surname! It belonged to his father, a man who abandoned his wife and boys in the 80's to shack up with a 20-year-old. Furthermore, it wasn't even a true link to the past, since his father's Russian grandparents had chosen it when they immigrated to sound more mainstream. I asked if he would have taken my maiden name, and he said no (he can be brutally honest that way!)... he would want to take his mother's family's original name. Not her Hungarian maiden name, but the very Jewish surname her family changed in 1930's Hungary to try to hide their Jewish-ness. That's what he considers to be his "true" family name. So I suggested that he should do that, and I would then adopt what I've really always considered my "true" family name: my Mom's maiden name. That's the family I grew up closest to, whose family reunions I attend, and whom I very much take after. (My Dad has always had differences with his own family, and since his parents passed away, has had little to do with any of them.) It sounded like such a great idea, we'd half decided to go through with it... until we put it to our 11-year-old, and she was horrified! (Too bad... the two "true" names would go very well hyphenated!) Oh well - for better or for worse, we're a family unit, and for our daughter, her "true" name is the one she's got. As a last thought (sorry for the long post) - I'm grateful to live in a society where women (and men too) are free to choose the family names that are right for them, and (hopefully) not be judged for it. I think we can all agree on that...
I agree with Anna (#54) about taking the father's surname as a matter of course. If it's a conscious choice, fine, but it doesn't make sense in this day and age to assume it as a given. Now, I myself changed my name when I got married... that was my conscious choice. (Actually I'd been dying to for years - my maiden name is both hard to spell and an easy target for teasing - DH's name has just one conceivable spelling and no awkward associations. I remember my Dad joking, "Lucky you... can I change it, too?") I had friends at the time who told me I should be more of a feminist and keep my own name... but isn't feminism all about having choices? DH was, I think, pleasantly surprised that I readily offered to change my name... he certainly didn't *expect* it. Of course, our daughter has the same last name as we do. My nephews and niece are all Firstname Momsname-Dadsname, and it works just fine for them (both parents keep their own names). Among my friends/acquaintances with young kids, maybe a third or more have hyphenated names... so it's becoming more of the norm in Canada as well.
Re Linnea: I love the name... but I have to say I prefer it pronounced with the accent on the first syllable. The only Linnea I ever met (a young woman speaking at a conference I attended, I believe she was Dutch) pronounced it this way, rhyming with 'zinnia', and I thought it sounded fresh and charming. Lin-NAY-ah is pretty too, but that sort of rhythm is awfully trendy, it reminds me a bit of Aaliyah, Neveah etc. (Lynnayah? LaNeyah?) But that's probably just me...
The comments about boomer generation naming choices made me smile. Not long ago my mother (born early 1940's) saw something on TV about a Jennifer, and said, "Jennifer! What a pretty name. I should have called you Jennifer." When I told her I thought the name was awfully common, she just gave me a funny look. I suppose she never went to school with a single Jennifer...
I guess my answer is C: Dad participated once the lists were made. Actually we were lucky - our only daughter's name was basically decided before I was even pregnant... I mentioned once how much I liked the name, and he told me it was similar to his late grandmother's name and how it would be a good name to use if he ever had a daughter. I kept that piece of information in the back of my mind until I needed it, and bam! Naming decision pretty much made. Being an NE, I almost felt cheated out of the whole process! But he wouldn't let me try and second guess myself. We did try a bit of negotiation over a boy's name, which turned out to be more challenging. Our personal tastes in boy's names are quite different - he likes short, simple, popular names and nicknamey names (Sam not Samuel, Zack not Zachary...) while I tend to prefer sophisticated, distinctive retro classics. We did a fair bit of vetoing one another. Fortunately, I guess, we've never had to make a final decision on that one! However... imagine my surprise quite recently when someone he works with called their baby Simon, and he said he thought it was a "pretty cool name". Simon was very definitely on my boy's list 11 years ago, and he turned his nose up at it immediately. Honestly!