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My grandpa and brother are Augusts, and they both go by Augie.
Thanks Jude. You're right, James first ended up on our list because we like the name and the nickname options it gives, not because it's my dad's name. Like I said, that was just a bonus to me, although I have thought recently that I wish it wasn't my dad's name so we could avoid all this potential drama, haha!
Another vote for Calvin! I really wish I could get my husband on board with that one...
Thanks, NoakQuade! I do like both Jacob and Jake, but my husband already said no to that one.
Thanks, fancynancy. He's always a Jim! And since our James will likely never be a Jim, I'm hoping this will be enough for my mom!
Thanks so much for the encouragement, erikafabulous! That's a good point about how my dad would feel if he found out we decided not to name baby after him. I'm sure he's not expecting it or anything, but I'm also sure it would mean a lot to him if we did. I'm not a fan of calling someone by their middle name, either. I always wonder why they didn't just use it in the first name slot!
Thanks, Jujube! If I bring it up to her soon she would have months to warm up to the idea, which she might! Worth a try, right? :)
Thanks, NotAGuestAnymore! Joseph I like almost as much as James, but I can't get husband to go for it, unfortunately! But that's exactly it... I love the idea of a Jay or JT, and James is my favorite J name and the only one that I like that my husband will agree to.
And I really think my dad would be very honored with our choice... I'm sure he's not expecting it. He is a very humble guy and I think he would love having that connection with his grandson. Even though my mom never had a good relationship after they divorced, I have been able to develp a great and loving relationship with him. He is someone I would have no problem naming my son after.
Thank you, hyz! That middle paragraph that you typed is pretty much spot on exactly what I've decided to do! I'm hoping that it goes well!
One of the reasons I like James so much is not that it's my dad's name, but that I love the nickname options it provides. Jay is my favorite boy's nickname (although I don't like it as the birth certificate full name), and James is the only J name that my husband and I both like (and happens to be my favorite J name). Husband likes the idea of JT, which I would also be on board with. :) I love initials as nicknames! If JT doesn't work out, I might try to work it out so I can have an AJ or an EJ or something. :)
Thanks HungarianNameGeek! I like your idea of presenting the name to her with some other options, so that she can sort of give her opinion on multiple names instead of just putting her on the spot and making her talk about James before we've even given her any other options.
I do like the name Jacob, but my husband already said no to it! I actually didn't know they have the same origin though, how interesting! And thanks for the info on Austin.. I didn't know that either. My grandfather and brother are actually both named August, and my mom has always wanted one of her kids to use August in honor of her father, which I like but my husband doesn't. Austin might be a way to get around that.. :)
Thanks, JnHsmom! About the aisle thing, I didn't even hear a single remark until about two years after the wedding and nothing since! But it's something I won't ever forget, even if she never mentions it again... I am a little concerned that if we use James that she'll act like she's fine with it until a few years go by, and then bring up that it hurt her when I can't do anything about it since the option to change our choice is long gone! I don't think she would make multiple remarks about it over the years, but I could see her bringing it up once sometime in the future and then I would always know how she really felt about his name and that would definitely taint my happiness with the choice.
I really wish Calvin was more of an option for us, because I absolutely love that name as well! But I am 99% sure I could never get my husband to go for it. Something about somebody he knew once named Calvin... you know how those impressions about a name based on a single person can be hard to shake!
Thanks for the response, Laura V! I've been thinking about it, and I think my mom would be even more hurt if we surprised her with this once the baby was born, or if I brought it up without giving her the option to talk it through with me. When you mentioned your mom simply made a face at your name choice and that was the end of it, it did make me think of this: I am a little bit concerned though that to spare my feelings, she won't say much about it and give me the impression that she's ok with it, and then in a few years I discover she really did have a big problem with the name choice all along. She's the type that might just hold in her displeasure until she can't take it anymore and bring it up once the baby is a toddler or older and I can't do anything about it. I would hate that... I really want her to be honest with me.
Thanks sharalyns! I would definitely consider using James as the middle name, especially if this would be an acceptable compromise to my mom. You have me loving Alexander James! Your son has a great name. :)
But if she doesn't like the idea of using James at all, I think I'll have to cross it off our list entirely, unfortunately.
I wanted to thank all of you for the kind and thoughtful responses! I really appreciate your time and willingness to help me figure out a solution to what has been becoming a source of stress recently. What an awesome, well spoken, and wise community here!
I have decided that I am going to talk to my mom before we do anything else - either commit to the name or cross it off our list entirely. I guess I won't really know for sure how she'll feel about it without having that conversation! She's been asking me for a list of names anyway... I'm going to be honest and keep James on the list, and explain to her about our ideas for nicknames (which honestly, I'm a nickname lover, and I can see myself calling our baby by a nickname most of the time, if not all of the time. I am also in the group of people who would always give the baby the full name instead of the nickname on the birth certificate... I like the idea of giving the kid options as he gets older!) And then I'll just hear what she has to say! I am hoping that nickname options will be enought to warm her up to the idea of a baby James, but I have also been preparing myself to cross the name off our list if she responds poorly. A few of the other names have been growing on me more as a result, especially Alexander and Ethan (which is becoming my husband's new favorite).
Thank you all again! I will definitely let you know how it goes! I'm hoping I was just making this a bigger deal in my mind than it actually will end up becoming. :)
Louise is my middle name, as well as my mother's and grandmother's. If I am blessed with a daughter someday, you can bet her middle name will be Louise. :)
My husband's would be Gwendolyn. He says everyone he's ever mentioned it to wasn't a big fan (including me, I guess).
I would love to use "November" for a girl, but no way would my husband go for it (even in the middle!) My brother and grandfather are both named August, and we have so many family members born in November (including my mom, grandma, sister, and husband!) that it would be a nice little tribute to everyone!
I love everything about the name Marisol! The way it looks, the way it sounds, the way it's spelled... Unfortunately I have absolutely no ties to Hispanic culture (unless you count taking Spanish classes in high school) and I would feel too strange taking a name from a culture I don't belong to and using it on my own child. It is such a beautiful name, though!
Benjamin and Caroline
James and Kelvin
Just an interesting name I heard the other day: a little girl named Daytona. I figured they must be race fans?
I know a 21 year old Irene and the name is lovely on her! She's a dancer, so to me the name always sounds graceful. :)
I'm also a fan of Pauline. I know and really look up to a woman named Pauline, and would consider using it for a middle name if my husband didn't hate it so much!