First baby on the way

My partner and I have been trying for a baby now for sometime and finally we have found we are pregnant with our first child.

We have decided on a boys name early on. James Edward. James because we love the name and Edward after both our grandfathers so it was an easy choice. 

For girl we have only settled on the first name. Sophie. For middle names we love so many names we find it hard to decide. All the names have some personal connection to us so none can be eliminated easily.

The names we like are...

Sophie Eleanor (Name of my grandmother and the name of his great grandmother.)

Sophie Elise (I have a sister called Elizabeth and he has a grandmother called it as well.)

Sophie Esther (A name both in our family trees.)

Sophie Iris (My grandmothers name and and in his family tree.)

Sophie Isabel (Same as Elise.)

Sophie Lucy (His sister is called Lucy. I just like the name.)

Sophie Marie (Marie is both our mother's middle names.)

Sophie Renee (We both like the name.)

Sophie Violet (A name in our family trees.)

Any help appreciated. Thanks.


By Feya
October 4, 2016 10:52 AM

Could someone sort out the formatting please? I don't know how it ended up this way.

October 4, 2016 11:22 AM

I've fixed it. It's a result of a recent update, that is eating everyone's line breaks. Unfortunately, only mods can really fix it with all other formatting intact; but if you click on "disable rich text" before you start your posts, you can have line breaks (just not bolding or italics).

If you have a minute, you could try using the "Contact Us" link way down at the bottom of the page to note the problem; hopefully if enough folks do so, the administrators (different from the mods) will do something about the problem.

By Feya
October 4, 2016 1:33 PM

Thanks for sorting it out nedibes.

October 4, 2016 6:29 PM

I've been having the same problem..

October 4, 2016 11:30 AM

Can you give us a hint about the last name? First letter, number of syllables, general sound? I don't usually think First-middle-last "flow" is very important, but in the case of tie-breaking it can be useful.

Otherwise, I personally would eliminate Eleanor, Esther, and Lucy on the grounds of first-middle "flow" (none are bad, just less-good than the rest).

I would also probably eliminate Isabel as it seems stylistically and popularity-wise very similar to Sophie, and it might be nice to have more variety between the two. I might also eliminate Marie on popularity grounds; it's not that common as a first name, but I think it's much more common as a middle (as your family tree shows!) and I imagine there are a LOT of Sophie Maries out there.

That leaves Elise, Iris, Renee, and Violet. I think any would be lovely; Iris might be my favorite for you, but I would probably make the decision based on which YOU love most (or which gives you the most warm-fuzzies, family-wise), and/or which flows best with the last name.

By Feya
October 4, 2016 1:36 PM

Our surname is Abbots. 

October 4, 2016 11:40 AM

I think that Sophie Eleanor or Sophie Lucy are the best, (although they don't flow very nicely). Have you thought about Sophie Elizabeth? It flows well and would be a nice notion to your sister and his grandmother. But, on a different note, if you have more than one sister it might be offensive to them to not use their name.

By Feya
October 4, 2016 1:38 PM

I have three sisters so I don't feel comfortable honouring one directly and not the others. Doesn't seem fair.

By rooo
October 5, 2016 11:45 PM

In this case, I wouldn't use Sophie Elise, Sophie Isabel or Sophie Lucy either. They are fine, but with so many other terrific options I wouldn't want to even partially favor one sibling (or sib-in-law) over the others, even if you are closer to that one.

Sophie Eleanor and Sophie Marie rise to the top for me. In addition to being great names, the honor feels pretty balanced on both sides.

By Feya
October 14, 2016 2:41 PM

Sophie Marie is a top contender at the moment. Eleanor is off the table though.

By EVie
October 4, 2016 12:03 PM

I adore Sophie Iris. Sophie is a lovely, classic name, but not uncommon these days, and it's always nice to spice up a classic first with a more striking and distinctive middle. Iris really fits the bill. My second choices for you would probably be Sophie Esther and Sophie Eleanor. Sophie Violet is very pretty as well. I find Elise, Renee and especially Marie to be very common, expected choices for middle names that don't do much to make Sophie pop, if that makes sense; I also don't think Marie is as meaningful used as a family name, since it's *everybody's* middle name, and it sounds like Renee doesn't have as much personal meaning as the rest. Elise is really pretty, so that would be my favorite of those three. I don't care for the repeated "ee" ending of Sophie Lucy, though I do like Lucy a lot. 

October 4, 2016 1:00 PM

I like Sophie Elise best from your list. I think all of them are fine, though! I also like that Marie is a family name on both sides, and Marie flows well with Sophie. I think the least favorite of this list for me would be Sophie Lucy, just because of the ending sounds being too similar IMO.

October 4, 2016 6:00 PM

Taking everything into account--name flow, last name, balancing popularity with more distinctiveness, which relative(s) would be honored--my vote is for Sophie Eleanor.

I like Iris but don't think it flows well when said with the last name.

Marie is such a middle name filler that it almost disappears. As it is a highly popular first name, disappearing isn't something I'd value for the middle.

The best combo on the list is for grandparents, which doesn't pose any drama potential like choosing one sister can create. It also includes people from both sides of the family tree.

I think S0phie Elean0r Abb0ts is a slam dunk.

October 4, 2016 8:27 PM

I think the strength of the family connection should be considered.  For example, I would keep Marie on the list, middle name of both grandmothers is a rather strong connection.  However, I would probably eliminate something like Violet, as it sounds like this is just a name in your family trees, but without a direct or especially strong sentimental connection.

So, narrowing it down, I would eliminate Violet, Renee & Esther, as it sounds like the family connection isn't particularly strong with any of them.

I would probably consider names like Marie, Elise & Isabel "first tier."  All of these names are found on both sides of the family, and they all have fairly direct connections (meaning it's probable you & your husband have/had reasonably close relationships with those relatives).

Eleanor, Iris & Lucy would be my "2nd tier" names.  The degree of reationship to the original name holder is further than the 1st tier names, or they lost points for being found only on one side of the family.  However, my tier ranking may not hold true for you.  It's possible your husband had a very close relationship with his great-grandmother Eleanor-or perhaps you & your sister Elizabeth aren't especially close.  Situations like that may cause a particular name to gain or lose points.

October 4, 2016 8:32 PM

Funky formatting.  I actually had some spaces in there when I typed this.

October 6, 2016 2:23 PM

There's a partial fix for the linebreak bug: use Shift+Enter instead of plain Enter. This inserts line breaks instead of paragraph marks.

(Apparently some [insert derogatory adjective here] person decided to change the settings to disallow <p> and <br>. Right, that makes exactly as much sense as you think it does, namely none whatsoever. Anyway, they've now deigned to allow <br>, but they still aren't allowing <p>, despite the fact that their own WYSIWYG editor uses <p> for almost everything.)

By mk
October 5, 2016 3:42 PM

I like Sophie Elise best, I think. Sophie Lucy is my least favorite for how they sound together, though I like both names. Yes, flow is not really important. However, since you have such a long list it can be a way to start cutting it down. Plus, I do use my own middle name fairly often. I also agree that a good way to cut it down is to consider family relationships. Using the name of relative you are close to is more meaningful than one that just happens to show up in your family, in my opinion.

October 5, 2016 6:47 PM

Marie is the easy winner for me

You can't get much better than a name that honors both grandmas equally! 

It's also a sweet classic, and it sounds darling with Sophie. Yes, it's a popular choice, but Sophie is uber popular, and that doesn't make it less lovely.



October 6, 2016 2:16 AM

My favourites are Sophie Eleanor, Sophie Iris and Sophie Elise in that order. 

My personal favourite is Sophie Iris, but Sophie Eleanor takes the win because the strength of the family connection is more evenly balanced between the two of you. Honestly though all the names you have listed are beautiful and classic choices, you can't go wrong. 

By Feya
October 7, 2016 7:06 PM

Thank you for all the replies so far. We have spoken further and we have decided to eliminate Eleanor (we don't like it enough), Elise (I don't feel comfortable honouring one sister and not the others), Isabel (same as Elise), Lucy (we don't like the flow), Renee (not an honour name) and Violet (we don't like the name enough).

That leaves Esther, Iris and Marie. We love all of them and can not decide. Which one would you use and why? Thanks.

One more name under consideration which we had veoted is Sarah. We are not about having two S names but we like the idea of the alliteration. Sarah is used both in our family trees. Infact it is a name used for both of our great grandmothers. We do have a spelling issue with this one though as one grandmother was called Sara and one was called Sarah. They were pronouced the same though. Which spelling do you prefer Sarah or Sara?

October 7, 2016 8:39 PM

Out of those three I would probably go Sophie Marie as first choice (I like the flow and it's a nice connection for her to have the same middle name as both her grandmas), Sophie Esther as second choice (just because I like the name and it seems like it's balanced with honouring both sides of the family, and I like the flow better than Iris).

As far as the Sarah/Sara issue, how are you pronouncing the name? I would say Sarah "sare-uh" and Sara "sar-ra" so I would go with whichever spelling reflects the way their names were pronounced. 

By Feya
October 8, 2016 7:14 AM

We pronouce both names Sare-uh.

October 7, 2016 9:02 PM

I think it depends on how much you want to honor particular family members, balanced with how concerned you are with potential identity confusion.

I generally don't think a name's popularity should be a reason not to choose it. However, I do think there's value in the full name not being super common. Your last name isn't particularly uncommon, Sophie is very common, and Marie is probably a top 5 middle name choice for girls over the past half century or more. Put all that together, and there are many, many Sophie Maries out there (do a quick Facebook search to see what I mean) and I suspect more than a few of them with your daughter's potential full name. That may not matter to you, but it is something to think about.

If it were me, I would probably use Marie for sentimental purposes, but add a second middle for differentiation. Otherwise, Iris would get my vote a the most distinctive choice.

By rooo
October 9, 2016 2:10 AM

I would choose Sophie Marie.

To honor both Sara(h)s I would go with a variation - Sadie, Sally, Sarina, Zara. I know you are happy with Sophie as a first name, but you could instead use Sadie Marie or Sally Marie and get two honors in one name.


October 8, 2016 10:30 AM

Is Marie still being given as a middle name? I think of it as a name from my generation (I'm in my fifties). It is actually my middle name, after my mother's favorite aunt. In any case, I think it is the best choice here, both because of the family connection and for the way it sounds with Sophie. 

By Feya
October 8, 2016 8:29 PM

Another name my husband and I have fallen in love with is Stella. Does Sophie Stella flow ok?